Reporter: Welcome y’all to another edition of Entertainment Tonight Southern Style. I’m Virginia Wolfe and boy do we have a show for you tonight. In the first interview since he was declared innocent, Wolfgang “wolfie” van Halen tells his side of the story. As you all remember, Wolfie was arrested and charged with the murder of 2 of the 3 brothers of the prominent Pigg family, which until recently handled the management of Van Halen, the band started by Wolfie’s father Eddie and now came to include Wolfie as well. We have a clip here from the trial and then live from his top floor “tree” house Wolfgang van Halen.
Cut to Video from trial
Reporter: Now a short word from our Sponsors.
Reporter: Welcome Back Everyone.
Here with me today is drummer of the popular band Van Halen, Wolfgang Van Halen. Welcome wolfie- may I call you wolfie?
Wolfgang- Yea man it’s all the same anyway.
Reporter- Great, first off, how does it feel to be out of jail, name cleared and back to playing music?
Wolfgang- You have no idea, remember that I was arrested on April 20th, 2008 and because of my *cough* celebrity status *cough* I was deemed a flight risk and sat in jail for the six months of the trial. It is just unbelievable that in this age, prejudices like this could still exist. The judge and jury was entirely composed of Adult Pigs so to be found innocent is a great honor and life on the road with my dad has been great.
Reporter: Wow, if you had the chance today, what would you say to your former Manager, Tre Cool Pig, the convicted killer of his two brothers and the person who testified against you?
Wolfgang: I know many of my fans are upset at this guy and expect me to be also, I’m just not. He’s the one who has to live with the fact that he killed his 2 older brothers who were also involved the apparent scheme to scam bands. So there is nothing I could say or do, that would amount to the heaviness of that. Of course, I’m damn glad the truth came out and he will now spend the rest of his life in prison. Those 3 pigs were my best friends and I will definitely miss the good times we shared but that’s over now.
Reporter: Words to live by, exclusively here on Entertainment Tonight with Wolfgang Van Halen. The evidence did show a video of you visiting the 2 older pigs houses the same day as their deaths, at any time did you feel you were going to be in jail for the rest of your life.
W: Um yeah, especially because of the whole bail issue, it was just a big setup, since Tre had told me to visit his 2 brothers that day and sign-off on the new artwork for the upcoming album. If it wasn’t for his directions I would never have gone there. Luckily Tre’s hoof prints were present and the murder weapon was found.
Reporter: I think we’ve heard enough of the past, when can Forrest Hills expect the release of that new album?
W: I’m hoping 6 months, but realistically a year, the trial set us all back and in prison I wrote a ton of new songs that we now need to record and add to the album. So we in the process of putting together what we feel will be the best album and explain what really happened.
Reporter: That’s the end of this edition of Entertainment Tonight, I’m Virginia Wolfe, remember y’all Stay Positive and Love your Life. Goodnight.
Sunday, March 1, 2009
New Development of The Murder Story
Chairman (Iron Chef): Today, two champions met in battle of Mushroom here in Kitchen Stadium. Iron Chef Piggy Flay… Chef Gummy Bear… The Judges had spoken. And the winner is…
“We interrupt this broadcast for a special program”
Reporter: This is Honey Bee reporting on SFF News. The shocking murder story of the Pig family has new development. Two weeks ago, the Alexander T. Wolf was accused of a series of murders on Pig family by Piglet Pig. However, the jury of the Springfield Forest Court still could not agree with each other after 3 trials. Therefore, the court has decided to let all citizens of Springfield Forest to participate. Alexander T. Wolf’s case will be decided by the vote of Springfield Forest citizens. Don’t forget to vote after this interview.
Judge Cow: Mr. Wolf, did you kill Mr. Pig’s brothers, Crispy Pig and Roast Pig, on March 2nd?
Mr. Wolf: No, your honor. I was…
Mr. Pig: You liar. You killed my brothers, Crispy and Roast. You did. How dare you to deny it?
Judge Cow: Quiet!! Mr. Pig, it’s not your turn to speak yet. I’m asking Mr. Wolf question. If you interrupt me one more time, I will send you out of this court. Am I clear?
Mr. Pig: Yes, your honor.
Judge Cow: Mr. Wolf, did you or did you not kill Mr. Pig’s brothers?
Mr. Wolf: No, your honor. I did not kill Mr. Pig’s brothers.
Judge Cow: On March 2nd, did you go to Crispy Pig and Roast Pig’s house? And why?
Mr. Wolf: Yes, your honor. I went to their houses to borrow a cup of sugar. I was making a birthday cake for my granny that afternoon, but I ran out of sugar. That’s why I went there.
Judge Cow: Crispy and Roast Pig’s houses were destroyed and they were both found dead on March 2nd, the day you visited them. Were their houses destroyed when you got there? Were they alive when you got there?
Mr. Wolf: No, your honor. Their houses were fine when I got there.
Judge Cow: Then, what happened?
Mr. Wolf: I had a very bad cold, and I was sneezing all the time. When I went to Crispy Pig’s straw house for a cup of sugar, I sneezed a great sneeze. Then the straw house fell down, and I found Crispy Pig dead. And the same thing happened to Roast Pig.
Mr. Pig: See, your honor. He killed my brothers, and he admitted it.
Mr. Wolf: No, I didn’t kill them. They were killed by their stupid houses. Who on the earth would build a house with straw and sticks? If your brothers had a strong house like you do, then they would still be alive today!
Mr. Pig: But you are the one who destroyed their house and killed them. You are the murderer.
Mr. Wolf: if your brothers’ houses were destroyed by a tornado, would you accuse the tornado of murder?
Mr. Pig: But…
Judge Cow: Quiet!!! Mr. Wolf, as you said, Crispy Pig and Roast Pig were killed by their falling houses. What happened to their remains?
Mr. Wolf: I ate them.
Mr. Pig: You monster!!!!
Mr. Wolf: Come on, they were dead!!! It was like a piece of ham lying there on the ground. Everybody knows that food will spoil if you just leave it out in the open. So I ate them up.
Mr. Pig: This makes you the murderer. You should be sent to jail for the rest of your life.
Mr. Wolf: No, I’m not. I didn’t kill them. I just ate them. Would you call someone who eats steaks a “Cow Murderer”?
Judge Cow: Alright, quiet now. Let the citizens of Springfield Forest decide.
Reporter: Now, the court of Springfield Forest is opened for vote. You will decide either Alexander T. Wolf is guilty or not guilty. Call or Text “Guilty” or “Not Guilty” to 1-800-SF-COURT now. The voting will end in exactly one hour.
Reporter: The votes are already pouring in. Guilty… Not Guilty… Not Guilty… Guilty……
(An hour later…)
Reporter: Welcome back. This is Reporter Honey Bee. The voting is over. And now your vote will decide Mr. Wolf’s case. The counting is over. We have 387 votes for guilty. And for not guilty, we have 623 votes. Mr. Wolf is not guilty!!!
Judge Cow: The citizens of Springfield Forest have spoken. Alexander T. Wolf is found not guilty. And Mr. Wolf will be released immediately.
“We interrupt this broadcast for a special program”
Reporter: This is Honey Bee reporting on SFF News. The shocking murder story of the Pig family has new development. Two weeks ago, the Alexander T. Wolf was accused of a series of murders on Pig family by Piglet Pig. However, the jury of the Springfield Forest Court still could not agree with each other after 3 trials. Therefore, the court has decided to let all citizens of Springfield Forest to participate. Alexander T. Wolf’s case will be decided by the vote of Springfield Forest citizens. Don’t forget to vote after this interview.
Judge Cow: Mr. Wolf, did you kill Mr. Pig’s brothers, Crispy Pig and Roast Pig, on March 2nd?
Mr. Wolf: No, your honor. I was…
Mr. Pig: You liar. You killed my brothers, Crispy and Roast. You did. How dare you to deny it?
Judge Cow: Quiet!! Mr. Pig, it’s not your turn to speak yet. I’m asking Mr. Wolf question. If you interrupt me one more time, I will send you out of this court. Am I clear?
Mr. Pig: Yes, your honor.
Judge Cow: Mr. Wolf, did you or did you not kill Mr. Pig’s brothers?
Mr. Wolf: No, your honor. I did not kill Mr. Pig’s brothers.
Judge Cow: On March 2nd, did you go to Crispy Pig and Roast Pig’s house? And why?
Mr. Wolf: Yes, your honor. I went to their houses to borrow a cup of sugar. I was making a birthday cake for my granny that afternoon, but I ran out of sugar. That’s why I went there.
Judge Cow: Crispy and Roast Pig’s houses were destroyed and they were both found dead on March 2nd, the day you visited them. Were their houses destroyed when you got there? Were they alive when you got there?
Mr. Wolf: No, your honor. Their houses were fine when I got there.
Judge Cow: Then, what happened?
Mr. Wolf: I had a very bad cold, and I was sneezing all the time. When I went to Crispy Pig’s straw house for a cup of sugar, I sneezed a great sneeze. Then the straw house fell down, and I found Crispy Pig dead. And the same thing happened to Roast Pig.
Mr. Pig: See, your honor. He killed my brothers, and he admitted it.
Mr. Wolf: No, I didn’t kill them. They were killed by their stupid houses. Who on the earth would build a house with straw and sticks? If your brothers had a strong house like you do, then they would still be alive today!
Mr. Pig: But you are the one who destroyed their house and killed them. You are the murderer.
Mr. Wolf: if your brothers’ houses were destroyed by a tornado, would you accuse the tornado of murder?
Mr. Pig: But…
Judge Cow: Quiet!!! Mr. Wolf, as you said, Crispy Pig and Roast Pig were killed by their falling houses. What happened to their remains?
Mr. Wolf: I ate them.
Mr. Pig: You monster!!!!
Mr. Wolf: Come on, they were dead!!! It was like a piece of ham lying there on the ground. Everybody knows that food will spoil if you just leave it out in the open. So I ate them up.
Mr. Pig: This makes you the murderer. You should be sent to jail for the rest of your life.
Mr. Wolf: No, I’m not. I didn’t kill them. I just ate them. Would you call someone who eats steaks a “Cow Murderer”?
Judge Cow: Alright, quiet now. Let the citizens of Springfield Forest decide.
Reporter: Now, the court of Springfield Forest is opened for vote. You will decide either Alexander T. Wolf is guilty or not guilty. Call or Text “Guilty” or “Not Guilty” to 1-800-SF-COURT now. The voting will end in exactly one hour.
Reporter: The votes are already pouring in. Guilty… Not Guilty… Not Guilty… Guilty……
(An hour later…)
Reporter: Welcome back. This is Reporter Honey Bee. The voting is over. And now your vote will decide Mr. Wolf’s case. The counting is over. We have 387 votes for guilty. And for not guilty, we have 623 votes. Mr. Wolf is not guilty!!!
Judge Cow: The citizens of Springfield Forest have spoken. Alexander T. Wolf is found not guilty. And Mr. Wolf will be released immediately.
Court Room
Reporter: Good afternoon viewers, this is Chris Morris covering live outside the Raccoon City High Court. As you can see a lot of people have gathered in front of the court eagerly waiting for the plaintiff Mr. Pig who has charged the defendant Mr. Wolf with the cold blooded murders of his two young brothers.
(Door of the court opens)
Reporter: The door has opened and Mr. Pig is walking down with a bewildered look.
(Reporter rushes to Mr. Pig) Mr. Pig please tells us what happened inside?
Mr. Pig: This is terrible that wolf is lying between his teeth, he has declined the charge, and the jury granted him more time.
Reporter: Mr. Pig are you sure that Mr. Wolf could do such a thing?
Pig: Taking my land wasn’t enough for him. His hands are stained with the blood of my brothers. I can’t let this psycho roam freely. I want justice for my brothers. Hanging him will appease my heart and bring justice for my brothers.
(Wolf comes out. People are chanting “DOWN WITH WOLF”.
Reporter: Mr. Wolf please is this true that you lied in front of the judge even after swearing to tell the truth?
Mr. Wolf: listen I didn’t lay. I may look ugly and bad but I would never do such a horrible deed. Cross my heart and soul. Just because a few neighbors saw me running by the two pig’s houses doesn’t necessarily mean that I killed them. (Pig outraged)
Pig: You murderer I’ll get you for this.
Wolf: keep it down I didn’t kill them. I was trying to get help to rescue them from the wrecks.
Reporter: Is this true that you hated the pigs?
Wolf: We were good neighbors, I seldom saw them.
Reporter: But why do the people disagree with you?
Wolf: it’s just like I said I might look ugly and bad. They don’t care about me.
(Wolfs lawyer pulls him and sits in the car)
Reporter: Viewers here we are in a predicament. Who will win? Stay tuned next week to learn more.
Chris Morris is signing off.
(Door of the court opens)
Reporter: The door has opened and Mr. Pig is walking down with a bewildered look.
(Reporter rushes to Mr. Pig) Mr. Pig please tells us what happened inside?
Mr. Pig: This is terrible that wolf is lying between his teeth, he has declined the charge, and the jury granted him more time.
Reporter: Mr. Pig are you sure that Mr. Wolf could do such a thing?
Pig: Taking my land wasn’t enough for him. His hands are stained with the blood of my brothers. I can’t let this psycho roam freely. I want justice for my brothers. Hanging him will appease my heart and bring justice for my brothers.
(Wolf comes out. People are chanting “DOWN WITH WOLF”.
Reporter: Mr. Wolf please is this true that you lied in front of the judge even after swearing to tell the truth?
Mr. Wolf: listen I didn’t lay. I may look ugly and bad but I would never do such a horrible deed. Cross my heart and soul. Just because a few neighbors saw me running by the two pig’s houses doesn’t necessarily mean that I killed them. (Pig outraged)
Pig: You murderer I’ll get you for this.
Wolf: keep it down I didn’t kill them. I was trying to get help to rescue them from the wrecks.
Reporter: Is this true that you hated the pigs?
Wolf: We were good neighbors, I seldom saw them.
Reporter: But why do the people disagree with you?
Wolf: it’s just like I said I might look ugly and bad. They don’t care about me.
(Wolfs lawyer pulls him and sits in the car)
Reporter: Viewers here we are in a predicament. Who will win? Stay tuned next week to learn more.
Chris Morris is signing off.
O'Reilly Factor interview
Bill O'Reilly: Hi I'm Bill O'Reilly, thank you for watching us tonight. We now know how the case was decided by the courts last night with an unprecedented 5 minute decision made by the jury. Mr. Wolf was quickly deemed guilty by the jury of 4 ducks, 2 chickens, 5 mules, and 1 vegan wolf. And this will be the subject of tonight's reality check where we keep watch over the truth and make sure it is not messed with. This is what NBC's Matt Lauer said about the ruling on Today show this morning.
(Video Clip of today show )
Matt Lauer: Honestly I'm glad they put him away I can't find anything wrong with that decision that nobody would disagree with.
(End Video Clip back to Bill O'Reilly)
Bill O'Reilly: Anything that nobody... My third grade nun would have clocked him for that speech. Honestly there were many holes in that trial but nothing that Liberal NBC would disagree with. Alright enough of that. We here at the O'Reilly factor have to bring you the truth. It took us many weeks but we have Mr. Pig live from Kansas City and Mr. Wolf live from Ft. Leavenworth Prison here with us tonight. Welcome to the no spin zone.
(behind him a video feed of both Mr. Pig and Mr. Wolf pop up)
In Unison: Hi Bill.
Bill :Lets go check in with Mr. Wolf first. Hello Mr. Wolf you look like you are not doing so well.
Wolf: Yes it is rough on the inside. I'm in poor health as I have not received any treatment for the cold (fake sneezes, Pig rolls eyes) it has probably turned into Pneumonia.
Pig: You've been in jail five hours.
Bill: Ah Mr. Pig have to kick a Wolf when he is down.
Pig: (shakes head in frustration) He killed and ate my two brothers!
Bill: That is what the jury “convicted” him of. But we here at the O' Reilly Factor tend to disagree with the Liberal Media's portrayal of this sensational event, which has pushed you, Mr. Pig into quite some publicity these days.
Pig: Well I'm coming on your show to set the Right Wing Media and then I can go back to my life with my life partner Caroline.
Bill: Who are you calling right wing media? Here at Fox News we are fair and balanced. Only pinheads think we are Right Wing Media. Now your life partner... Caroline? Why don't you marry the poor girl and make a decent woman out of her.
Pig: We do not live by society's terms. More marriages end in divorce these days anyways.
Bill: And yet you will live by society's terms when it suits you? Like when it comes to wrongfully convicting Mr. Wolf here who was just looking for a cup of sugar? Mr. Wolf I apologize on the behalf of the country, looking for sugar is not a crime. In fact if you could send me your grannie's address I'll be happy to deliver a cake to her.
Wolf: Umm.. yeah. I'll give you that information later....
Pig: (tries to reiterate point) He killed my two brothers and ate them! There was no forensic evidence that he just sneezed in fact, my 2nd brother just had a new security system installed right before the vicious attack which showed that the video-
Bill: (interrupts) Video smideo, I've seen the testimony. I did not see any evidence beyond a reasonable doubt. Besides your brother would built a house out of sticks but invest in security camera. (scoffs) it sounds like your family has wrong values. (Wolf is nodding with his arms crossed) The same values that the Liberal Media agree with. So what if your brother had a damning video we don't know if that tape was made before hand. Alright Mr. Pig you can have the final word. Go.
Pig: I disagree-
Bill: (cuts off the pig again) Well thats all the time we have for today. Thanks to my participants Mr. Wolf and Mr. Pig.
(Video Clip of today show )
Matt Lauer: Honestly I'm glad they put him away I can't find anything wrong with that decision that nobody would disagree with.
(End Video Clip back to Bill O'Reilly)
Bill O'Reilly: Anything that nobody... My third grade nun would have clocked him for that speech. Honestly there were many holes in that trial but nothing that Liberal NBC would disagree with. Alright enough of that. We here at the O'Reilly factor have to bring you the truth. It took us many weeks but we have Mr. Pig live from Kansas City and Mr. Wolf live from Ft. Leavenworth Prison here with us tonight. Welcome to the no spin zone.
(behind him a video feed of both Mr. Pig and Mr. Wolf pop up)
In Unison: Hi Bill.
Bill :Lets go check in with Mr. Wolf first. Hello Mr. Wolf you look like you are not doing so well.
Wolf: Yes it is rough on the inside. I'm in poor health as I have not received any treatment for the cold (fake sneezes, Pig rolls eyes) it has probably turned into Pneumonia.
Pig: You've been in jail five hours.
Bill: Ah Mr. Pig have to kick a Wolf when he is down.
Pig: (shakes head in frustration) He killed and ate my two brothers!
Bill: That is what the jury “convicted” him of. But we here at the O' Reilly Factor tend to disagree with the Liberal Media's portrayal of this sensational event, which has pushed you, Mr. Pig into quite some publicity these days.
Pig: Well I'm coming on your show to set the Right Wing Media and then I can go back to my life with my life partner Caroline.
Bill: Who are you calling right wing media? Here at Fox News we are fair and balanced. Only pinheads think we are Right Wing Media. Now your life partner... Caroline? Why don't you marry the poor girl and make a decent woman out of her.
Pig: We do not live by society's terms. More marriages end in divorce these days anyways.
Bill: And yet you will live by society's terms when it suits you? Like when it comes to wrongfully convicting Mr. Wolf here who was just looking for a cup of sugar? Mr. Wolf I apologize on the behalf of the country, looking for sugar is not a crime. In fact if you could send me your grannie's address I'll be happy to deliver a cake to her.
Wolf: Umm.. yeah. I'll give you that information later....
Pig: (tries to reiterate point) He killed my two brothers and ate them! There was no forensic evidence that he just sneezed in fact, my 2nd brother just had a new security system installed right before the vicious attack which showed that the video-
Bill: (interrupts) Video smideo, I've seen the testimony. I did not see any evidence beyond a reasonable doubt. Besides your brother would built a house out of sticks but invest in security camera. (scoffs) it sounds like your family has wrong values. (Wolf is nodding with his arms crossed) The same values that the Liberal Media agree with. So what if your brother had a damning video we don't know if that tape was made before hand. Alright Mr. Pig you can have the final word. Go.
Pig: I disagree-
Bill: (cuts off the pig again) Well thats all the time we have for today. Thanks to my participants Mr. Wolf and Mr. Pig.
Innocent Wolf
On December 2008, Alexander Wolf is under investigation for the July 2007 murders of 2 little pigs from the 3 little pigs family. Two out of three of the little pigs have been murdered and the 3rd pig has been the only survivor and is claiming that Alexander Wolf is the murderer.
Pig III told the law enforcements that their mother had left them and told all the pigs to beware of Alexander Wolf. "All of us had to build our own homes and stay away from that wolf."
Mr. Wolf had came to Pig I's house and asked to let him in and the pig refused to open his doors to Mr. Wolf. The wolf did not obey the pig's request and huffed and puffed his house down, and ate the pig. Mr. Wolf also went to Pig II's house and asked if he can come in to warm his paws, and once he was warm he would go home again. Pig II refused to let him into his home and Mr. Wolf huffed and puffed his home down, and then ate him to.
I decided to interview Mr. Wolf and get answers to questions that our community has been waiting to hear.
Mr. Alexander Wolf, I am hear today to let you speak and tell your side of the story. We already know the pigs side of the story, but now it is your turn to speak in your defense.
Mr. Wolf says," The story has always been that I huffed and puffed the pigs' houses. But, it was not intentional like everyone was made to believe. I had a cold and I was sneezing and coughing which caused their houses to fall apart and kill them. The only reason I went to visit the pigs was to get a cup of sugar to bake a cake for my grandmother. The pigs would not give me any sugar! Pig III, insulted my grandmother and I got a little crazy and tried to get into his home. And it so happened that a reporter was around and published the story everyone knows today!"
**Breaking News** At 10 o'clock tonight an exclusive interview on the investigations and allegations on Mr. Alexander Wolf on the murders of the little pigs. Alexander Wolf tells his side of the story tonight and it is not the response we have been expecting! Stay tuned to hear the latest.
Tomorrow, Mr. Wolf will be taking the stand and testifying in his defense. He will be telling the truth, which no one has ever given him the chance to. But, He will get his chance finally tomorrow in court. And hopefully, the judge and the jury will see that he is a innocent wolf!
Pig III told the law enforcements that their mother had left them and told all the pigs to beware of Alexander Wolf. "All of us had to build our own homes and stay away from that wolf."
Mr. Wolf had came to Pig I's house and asked to let him in and the pig refused to open his doors to Mr. Wolf. The wolf did not obey the pig's request and huffed and puffed his house down, and ate the pig. Mr. Wolf also went to Pig II's house and asked if he can come in to warm his paws, and once he was warm he would go home again. Pig II refused to let him into his home and Mr. Wolf huffed and puffed his home down, and then ate him to.
I decided to interview Mr. Wolf and get answers to questions that our community has been waiting to hear.
Mr. Alexander Wolf, I am hear today to let you speak and tell your side of the story. We already know the pigs side of the story, but now it is your turn to speak in your defense.
Mr. Wolf says," The story has always been that I huffed and puffed the pigs' houses. But, it was not intentional like everyone was made to believe. I had a cold and I was sneezing and coughing which caused their houses to fall apart and kill them. The only reason I went to visit the pigs was to get a cup of sugar to bake a cake for my grandmother. The pigs would not give me any sugar! Pig III, insulted my grandmother and I got a little crazy and tried to get into his home. And it so happened that a reporter was around and published the story everyone knows today!"
**Breaking News** At 10 o'clock tonight an exclusive interview on the investigations and allegations on Mr. Alexander Wolf on the murders of the little pigs. Alexander Wolf tells his side of the story tonight and it is not the response we have been expecting! Stay tuned to hear the latest.
Tomorrow, Mr. Wolf will be taking the stand and testifying in his defense. He will be telling the truth, which no one has ever given him the chance to. But, He will get his chance finally tomorrow in court. And hopefully, the judge and the jury will see that he is a innocent wolf!
Saturday, February 28, 2009
False Allegations
REPORTER: Good morning everyone! It is seven o’clock in the morning and we are here standing right outside the Universal Animal Courthouse. Alexander T. Wolf is presenting his case before the Grand Jury today facing charges for the murder of the Two Little Pigs and attempt to murder the Third Little Pig. Alexander Wolf has been indicted and came today to appeal. The defendant has still the right of being presumed innocent, unless and until found guilty beyond a reasonable doubt. As you can all see behind me, the scene is crazy, animals and reporters are outside the Courthouse waiting for the decision of today’s Jury. Mr. Wolf has been kind enough to give us an exclusive interview before the trial.
--INTERVIEW--
REPORTER: Good morning Mr. Wolf. How are you today?
Mr. Wolf: Good morning Reporter. I am fine. There is nothing to be afraid of. I am finally winning this case today since I will be telling all the truth and will be discharged of all the false allegations against me.
REPORTER: Mr. Wolf, you were initially arrested on February 9th and were taking to the Piggie Precinct Jail where you spent one night and were released on probation. Now, after almost one month later and various appointments with the District Attorney (D.A.), you are presenting before the Grand Jury. How does that make you feel? And what do you have to say?
Mr. Wolf: I have been mistakenly charged with a felony. I brought my dear old granny with me who is giving me the support that I need. She is also presenting as a witness since the whole story started with my surprise for her birthday. On the afternoon of February 9th, I was making my dear old granny a cake for her birthday. I did not want to leave my house because I had a terrible cold, but I ran out of sugar for the cake. Therefore, I went to my neighbors’ house, the First Little Pig’s and then the Second Little Pig’s house. Both houses were poorly built… one was built out of straws and the other one was built out of sticks respectively. Between knocking on the doors and sneezing really hard because of my cold, both houses fell apart! I felt terrible for that, but I am glad that happened because I saw both Little Pigs on the floor, dead as doornails! What was I supposed to do?! After all, I am a wolf and I eat cute animals, dead animals of course. Besides, as everybody knows, food will spoil if you just leave it out in the open; therefore, I had two delicious dinner that night. You cannot blame me for that! I was very sick and needed the extra energy and protein for my immune system.
REPORTER: I understand Mr. Wolf, that makes sense. And what happened afterwards?
Mr. Wolf: I still did not have my cup of sugar for my dear old granny’s birthday cake. Hence, I went to the Third Little Pig’s house. I truly believe he was in a very bad mood; he did not want to see me or open his door. Moreover, he insulted my granny, my dear granny! And that was the moment I flipped out! You do not talk about my granny like that; I do not accept pigs saying inadequate statements about my family. So, continuing with my explanation of the facts, I was knocking his door so he apologized to me and at the same time, I was huffing and puffing and sneezing really badly and well… I was making a real scene.
REPORTER: And that was what the police saw, correct?
Mr. Wolf: Indeed dear reporter, indeed.
REPORTER: That is why it is very important to always hear both sides of the stories. Thank you very much Mr. Wolf and good luck.
This is an amazing case. Prosecutors have portrayed Mr. Wolf as an evil murderer animal. He has been indicted on charges of first-degree murder of the Little Pigs brothers. But everything has been a big misunderstanding and today justice will prevail. Alexander T. Wolf is taking the stand in his own defense and telling all the truth. We expect he will be free of charge and will host a big celebration party this evening!
Thank you for staying with us throughout this extensive coverage. We are going to commercials right now and will be back in sixty seconds. Do not go anywhere- stay tuned!
--INTERVIEW--
REPORTER: Good morning Mr. Wolf. How are you today?
Mr. Wolf: Good morning Reporter. I am fine. There is nothing to be afraid of. I am finally winning this case today since I will be telling all the truth and will be discharged of all the false allegations against me.
REPORTER: Mr. Wolf, you were initially arrested on February 9th and were taking to the Piggie Precinct Jail where you spent one night and were released on probation. Now, after almost one month later and various appointments with the District Attorney (D.A.), you are presenting before the Grand Jury. How does that make you feel? And what do you have to say?
Mr. Wolf: I have been mistakenly charged with a felony. I brought my dear old granny with me who is giving me the support that I need. She is also presenting as a witness since the whole story started with my surprise for her birthday. On the afternoon of February 9th, I was making my dear old granny a cake for her birthday. I did not want to leave my house because I had a terrible cold, but I ran out of sugar for the cake. Therefore, I went to my neighbors’ house, the First Little Pig’s and then the Second Little Pig’s house. Both houses were poorly built… one was built out of straws and the other one was built out of sticks respectively. Between knocking on the doors and sneezing really hard because of my cold, both houses fell apart! I felt terrible for that, but I am glad that happened because I saw both Little Pigs on the floor, dead as doornails! What was I supposed to do?! After all, I am a wolf and I eat cute animals, dead animals of course. Besides, as everybody knows, food will spoil if you just leave it out in the open; therefore, I had two delicious dinner that night. You cannot blame me for that! I was very sick and needed the extra energy and protein for my immune system.
REPORTER: I understand Mr. Wolf, that makes sense. And what happened afterwards?
Mr. Wolf: I still did not have my cup of sugar for my dear old granny’s birthday cake. Hence, I went to the Third Little Pig’s house. I truly believe he was in a very bad mood; he did not want to see me or open his door. Moreover, he insulted my granny, my dear granny! And that was the moment I flipped out! You do not talk about my granny like that; I do not accept pigs saying inadequate statements about my family. So, continuing with my explanation of the facts, I was knocking his door so he apologized to me and at the same time, I was huffing and puffing and sneezing really badly and well… I was making a real scene.
REPORTER: And that was what the police saw, correct?
Mr. Wolf: Indeed dear reporter, indeed.
REPORTER: That is why it is very important to always hear both sides of the stories. Thank you very much Mr. Wolf and good luck.
This is an amazing case. Prosecutors have portrayed Mr. Wolf as an evil murderer animal. He has been indicted on charges of first-degree murder of the Little Pigs brothers. But everything has been a big misunderstanding and today justice will prevail. Alexander T. Wolf is taking the stand in his own defense and telling all the truth. We expect he will be free of charge and will host a big celebration party this evening!
Thank you for staying with us throughout this extensive coverage. We are going to commercials right now and will be back in sixty seconds. Do not go anywhere- stay tuned!
Breaking News On The Murder of Two Pigs Trial
Reporter: "This is Malik Shahzad reporting on BBC Forest News and we are here live in front of the courtroom where the trial of Piggy C. Vs. The Wolf is taking place. We have received some information on the trial from unnamed sources. Our sources have told us that Piggy C. was caught by police attempting to murder The Wolf because The Wolf has supposedly eaten Piggy C's two younger brothers, Piggy A and Piggy B."
**BBC Forest News LIVE from inside the courtroom**
Judge: "Piggy C. you were caught tryin to murder The Wolf because you claim he has eaten your two brothers. How do you know it was he, who ate your two younger brothers?"
Piggy C: "Your honor we were warned by many people to stay away from The Wolf because he is going to try and eat us and in fact he was successful in eating my two younger brothers."
"The Wolf: "I did not eat your brothers Piggy C, they have been missing and I never had any intentions of eating you or your two brothers."
Piggy C: "You even tried to kill me but my house was too strong for you to be able to break-in. Yes I tried to kill you but any animal would after their two young brothers get eaten by you."
The Wolf: "I have no clue why I am being questioned when I have nothing to do with this. Piggy C you are the one who was caught trying to kill me, not the other way around."
Police Officer: "You honor I caught Piggy C. trying to kill The Wolf while he was walking home. He used the same excuse that The Wolf ate his two younger brothers and he is just tryin to get revenge for it. I just think Piggy C has gone mad because of the loss of his brothers and making up this story."
Judge: "It sure seems that way officer, I will leave it to the jury to decide the verdict of this case. We will take a two hour break and give the jury two hours to make the decision."
Piggy C: "Your honor we were warned by many people to stay away from The Wolf because he is going to try and eat us and in fact he was successful in eating my two younger brothers."
"The Wolf: "I did not eat your brothers Piggy C, they have been missing and I never had any intentions of eating you or your two brothers."
Piggy C: "You even tried to kill me but my house was too strong for you to be able to break-in. Yes I tried to kill you but any animal would after their two young brothers get eaten by you."
The Wolf: "I have no clue why I am being questioned when I have nothing to do with this. Piggy C you are the one who was caught trying to kill me, not the other way around."
Police Officer: "You honor I caught Piggy C. trying to kill The Wolf while he was walking home. He used the same excuse that The Wolf ate his two younger brothers and he is just tryin to get revenge for it. I just think Piggy C has gone mad because of the loss of his brothers and making up this story."
Judge: "It sure seems that way officer, I will leave it to the jury to decide the verdict of this case. We will take a two hour break and give the jury two hours to make the decision."
**After two hours**
Jury Speaker: "We the jury have decided this case in the favor of The Wolf as Piggy C was caught by the police attempting to murder The Wolf and is making false accusation as a cover up."
Judge: "Yes I agree. I order Piggy C to psychiatric therapy for 6 months and he will be re-evaluated again and serve one year in prison. The Wolf is free to walk. Case CLOSED!"
Reporter: "Holy cow we just saw the verdict of the most famous case and you saw it here only at BBC Forest News. Goodbye."
***After serving his time at psychiatric therapy and spending one year in prison, Piggy C was finally free to go. Just as he had been planning all this time while serving his sentence, Piggy C went to The Wolf's house and knocked on the door.***
The Wolf: "Whose there?"
Piggy C: "Its your neighbor, I have brought you some fresh cooked beef."
***The Wolf was so greedy that he opened the door in a hurry and that was the end of him, Piggy C killed The Wolf instantly and ran off to a different forest to spend the rest of his life***
Judge: "Yes I agree. I order Piggy C to psychiatric therapy for 6 months and he will be re-evaluated again and serve one year in prison. The Wolf is free to walk. Case CLOSED!"
Reporter: "Holy cow we just saw the verdict of the most famous case and you saw it here only at BBC Forest News. Goodbye."
***After serving his time at psychiatric therapy and spending one year in prison, Piggy C was finally free to go. Just as he had been planning all this time while serving his sentence, Piggy C went to The Wolf's house and knocked on the door.***
The Wolf: "Whose there?"
Piggy C: "Its your neighbor, I have brought you some fresh cooked beef."
***The Wolf was so greedy that he opened the door in a hurry and that was the end of him, Piggy C killed The Wolf instantly and ran off to a different forest to spend the rest of his life***
THE END
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