In one of the most sensational trails here in Big Sausage County, Alexander T. Wolf, most notably known for his suspicious involvement in the disappearance of well known prostitute Little Red Riding Hood, now faces life in prison for the murder of the Pigotti Brothers.
We now turn to live streaming coverage of the courtroom drama were the Honorable Judge; I.M. Octodad presides over the case.
A.T. Wolf: Yo honor, I been framed I tell ya, and I know who done it. It was not I who killed the Pigotti brothers, as for when I went to cop some sugar, they were already dead. I’ve been hoodwinked and bamboozled your honor.
Judge: Please explain ( Judge listens to case while feeding his children )
A.T. Wolf: You see honor after losing my entire life’s savings to Bunny Madeoff I’ve had to result to unconventional methods to get my sugar. I used to have it delivered to me by Snaky Robinson. But now as my funds have dried up I decided to hit up my neighbors so I can finish this cake from my grandmother.
So I head down the street to see my boy and good friend Little Bacon Pigotti and this M***F***** must have really fallen on hard times because his new house was made of straw. So anyway your honor my nose is itching like crazy from some previous sugar I used on my grandmothers cake and I start sneezing like an animal. I accidently blow my boys house down, but strangely enough it appears that Little Bacon had all ready been dead.
So then I head down to his bothers and low and behold my nose is itching like crazy and yep you guessed it, I start sneezing like a M**** F*** and I accidently blow his wooden house down. And yes, he was dead also.
Your honor I would like to point out for the record, that straws and sticks might kill some and ants, but there not going to kill a 350 pound pig.
So then I go to there big brothers house “Big Hamhock Pigotti” and this guy already waiting for me with the police and news crews. The word on the street is that Hamhock had fallen on hard times your honor, and had his two brothers whacked so he can collect the insurance money.
So there you have it your honor, I’ve been framed I tell ya, I’ve been framed.
4 comments:
Oh this is so funny. It is a very good self-justification from the wolf. I could see the wolf's facial expression vividly. The story line seems a little bit ridiculous.Somehow it just really fit in our current economic predicament. I like this kind "out of box" story.
It is true that some people are always right – they claim the problem is you, the leader, the society, or like what you said, the medical issues. There is no doubt that sometimes they can make a way out of the trouble. The U.S. Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner found an excuse for his unpaid tax. He has forgone his full responsibility and blamed on the TurboTax software. Your story is a unique approach. The jokes of current event are my favor! Well done!
Bunny Madeoff? Hahaha That was a good one! Thanks Gd, the real “Bunny” is not gonna be munching on the people’s green any longer. Now he will be provided a cozy bunk bed together with 10 more “roommates”. The only sad thing is that there is no way the damage that he caused to millions of people will ever be rectified. But you story did make me smile. Thanks a lot!
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