Voice off: “And now the news you, our loyal audience, have been waiting for…
Live from Animal Kingdom City Court House, our special-criminal reporter brings us the latest in the case “El Lobo Feroz vs. Animal Kingdom City.”
Anchorman: “Good evening Karina, please update us with the latest on this case.”
Reporter: “Good evening Fred, and good evening to all citizens of A.K., and for those who are watching us through satellite, good evening citizens of Humanity City.
The trial to Mr. Feroz has changed 180 degrees, after we have heard Mr. Feroz’s defense to appeal the death row sentence, common in first degree murder cases like this, for a life in prison sentence due to the revealing confessions made by Mr. Feroz minutes ago.
Let’s watch what Mr. Feroz has confessed under oath, moments ago…”
Mr. Feroz’s Defense: “so, Mr. Feroz, please tell us in your own words, what happened the day of June 21st, 3025?”
Mr. Feroz: “Ok. Whatever you will hear here in this court is as per described in my journal, and not from my memories, since I have no short-term memory and I wouldn’t be able to remember what happened yesterday. I’d like to start this declaration by saying my life has been very miserable ever since that fatal accident. You see, Mr. Lawyer, I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder when I was 7, and to make things worse, 3 years ago I was victim of a bizarre accident that made my life more miserable that what already was.”
Prosecutor: “Your Honor, whether Mr. Feroz’s life is difficult or not is irrelevant to this case.”
Mr. Feroz’s Defense: “Your Honor, Mr. Feroz is just trying to picture how miserable his life has been in the last three years.”
Judge: “Proceed. Mr. Feroz life is irrelevant to this case. Mr. Feroz should attain to only explain us what happened that day.”
Mr. Feroz: “In order for me to remember what I have done the day before, every night before going to sleep, I will keep a journal relating what I did that day, and with instructions of what to do next day. This I was told, as you know I have no long-term memory to remember I keep a journal. That day however, I must have finished writing in the last page of that journal, and must have decided to put it away – I still cannot figure out where I put it- anyway; I must have fallen sleep before having a chance to start a new journal, because the next day I was lying down in my sofa when I woke up. It was a new day. I have a big board in my living room where in big letters I must have written “Read the journal that’s on your nightstand” so I could remind myself of the things I had to do that day, and of course, to remind myself about my medical condition. I went to my bedroom looking for the journal, and couldn’t find it. I started getting nervous. Went back to the living room and found over the coffee table a journal; opened but there was nothing on it. I didn’t know what to do. I went to the restroom, so I could get some fresh water in my face, when I saw the pills in my mirror stand. I didn’t know how many, which ones, or even at what hour to take the pills, so I decided to take them all at once. I figured out, I have to take al least one of each per day, so I might as well just take them all at once. What a bad decision. The day passed by, and I kept trying to remember, all in vain, what things I was supposed to do that day. I started looking around the house, looking for chores unfinished, and realized there were some clothing that needed some ironing, so I decided to iron them while listening to the radio, thinking that maybe any word in the news would ring a bell about what I had done yesterday. That’s when I heard the sad news about Mrs. Puerca deceased. I looked up and saw many photos of Mr. Puerca and me all around my house. Later I would find out, she was my therapist at the local Veterinary. Because I saw so many pictures of her in my house, I assumed we were close friends and I decided to pay a visit to her off-springs to offer condolences. How do I know she had off-springs? I knew it because they said it in the news. They gave the addresses too, so I just took a pencil and wrote them down. I went to visit Mrs. Puerca off-springs and that’s were my journal stops. That’s all I can tell you as per my memory is not good, and my journal stops there. Now, I found myself being judge for a murder of Mrs. Puerca two youngest off-springs, and it’s certainly something I don’t recall doing….I cannot deny the forensic proofs that show, indeed, it is my DNA the one found on the carpet of Puerco’s house (youngest off-spring) neither I cannot deny the fingerprints found all over Puerquito (the middle son) apartment…However, something I can do is to beg you please, members of the Jury, to take into consideration the explanation I have just given to you, and if you don’t believe me, to pay attention to the medical explanation my doctor will expose in brief minutes. If after hearing his words, you still want to judge me, I will respect it.”
Reporter: “Very well, the Jury have been left astonished; there is a great commotion in the Court room right now, and the Grand Judge has called to a recess and has requested for the Prosecutor and the Defense to approach the podium. This seems to have been not only a surprise for the members of the Jury, but also a big surprise for the Judge. Do you have any questions, Fred?”
Anchorman: “Karina, to be honest with you, we all here at the studio are overwhelmed after hearing Mr. Feroz speech. However, I have here in my notes that, in fact, it’s true; Mr. Feroz certainly suffers from short-term memory loss as his medical records indicate. It happened 3 year ago, and I’m quoting the local newspaper now, “ In a strange stampede of American wild horses, Mr. Feroz and a couple of other animals suffered really bad injures, being Mr. Feroz who suffered the worst part since his brain was compromised, and his ability to retain short-term memory lost. His short-term memory was reduced to an only one of 24 hours, moment at when whatever it retains, will be erased, and start processing new information again. In other words, every day would be a new day for Mr. Feroz since now on.”
Anchorman: “Do you remember this case, Karina”
Reporter: “Now that you mentioned it Fred, I do remember. It happened sometime ago and it was in the front news of every paper.”
Anchorman: “However, Karina, could it be possible that he didn’t took his medicine as prescribed that particular morning, and that his journal didn’t have any writings on it, again that particular morning , and that he committed the two murders without knowingly knowing what he was doing, and, as he seems to claim, because of the influenced of the medications? It’s just a great series of unfortunate events quite difficult to believe. Karina, what do you think?”
Reporter: “I’m as shock as you are Fred, but I think it is important to point out that a case like this already existed back in 2003 in a extinct country called Peru; however, the fact that this could be the same are only speculations and we need to hear the Doctor’s statement who, we have been told, would be coming next after the recess.
Reporter: “Back to you Fred”
Anchorman: “Well Karina, thank you for the coverage; we now need to go to some publicity, but please don’t change the channel as this case has become even more interesting since Mr. Feroz declarations. Stay tuned for more; this is Channel 13 and we will be back life from Animal Kingdom Court House after these short commercials.”
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Sunday, October 5, 2008
WE REPORT AND YOU ULTIMATELY DECIDE
The news begin anew on the afternoon edition of the justice channel, and you are looking live at the cape forest district court where the trial of the last little pig named Tommy versus the cape forest state is underway for the murder of Frank the wolf. The prosecution in his opening statement alleged that Tommy plan with tact the assault to kill Frank the wolf because his late mother had borrowed food from Frank the wolf and offered her children in the event that she died and the loan wasn't settle. The prosecution further explained that they will be bringing witnesses forward to make their case and assure the jury that once all the relevant informations are shown to the court they will have no choice but to convict Tommy.
The defense at their turn are making the case that Frank the Wolf was the most vicious and deceitful character that Cape Forest have seen in recent memories, furthermore he killed the two brothers of tommy and that Tommy was smart enough to read right into his playbook and return that against him in self defense which resulted in the death of Frank the wolf. The defense vowed to fight this case all the way to the end and will provide testimony to disprove the prosecution theory.
From my experience as a court reporter, I can tell you that this is going to be a very bitter trial because there is a lot of animosity from both side. All side believe in their theory and the ultimate decision will rest in the hands of the jury.
The prosecution called forward Tommy, in cross examination the prosecution asked this:
"Tommy is it true that your mother and Frank the Wolf had some sort of friendship?" Tommy answered "yes" the prosecution replied "is it also true that your mother couldn't survive on her own therefore consistently ask Frank the wolf for her day to day food supply". From the look on his face you can tell that Tommy got really annoyed by this question, her fired back " I hope I don't patronize you for saying this but my mother didn't relied on Frank the Wolf for her food supply, she always took care of me and my brothers and never expected anything from anybody". Next the prosecution called Frank the Wolf best friend who was named Vern the Leopard. Vern testifies that he witnesses many time his friend taking food to Tommy's mother and she would feed her children and will always say I will pay you in kind and if I died before you collect some sort of payment my children will be oblige to pay you if not you can have them as a valid payment of your debt. Vern also mentioned that many time his friend will just pay Tommy's mom a visit just to check on her and her children and never mentioning the debt that she owed him. Vern indicated how disappointed he was that not only his best friend didn't not receive any sort of payment for the debt he was owed but he was murder because of his kindness.
The defense on cross examination slammed Vern the Leopard calling an opportunistic character who is trying to collect a non existent debt that was concocted by Frank the wolf to conduct his deplorable activities. The defense called Frank the wolf a liar, a murderer, and a character that was out to do anything possible to cheat and deceive anyone and the proof of that is that he had Vern the Leopard as his best friend. The defense also mentioned that Vern the Leopard testament could not be trusted because of his own despicable record, both Frank the Wolf and Vern the Leopard have their name on each other wills because they are both murderers and that is a way to ensure that even if one perils the other can still cary on the murder spree.
The defense made their arguments by first detailing the character of Tommy and also by showing the good deed that he consistently does for the community and then brought the attention to his brothers that were viciously killed and eaten by Frank the wolf.
The defense contended that after the death of Tommy's mother, Frank the Wolf was happy because the death of their mother meant open season of the three lil pigs because she was the only one that deterred Frank the Wolf from killing her children. Tommy being the smartest out of the three of them knew that somehow he had to prepare himself against Frank the Wolf in an event Frank attack. He remembered the last word his mother told him before she died in which she insisted that they stay far away from Frank the wolf because he was a villain and that he will not hesitate to use them as a meal. Tommy by the voice of the defense attests that those last word spoken by his mother vis a vis Frank the wolf before she died was indelible. Soon after his mother's death, Frank the wolf was at it just as his mother warned killing his brother one after one and then sat his eyes on Tommy. Frank knew that Tommy was as smart as they come and that he will have to use a very skill way to deceit Tommy which he knew will not be easy, but one thing Frank the Wolf didn't think of is the ability of Tommy to defend himself by any mean necessary. Tommy recognized that his brothers got killed not because they were stupid but rather because they were deceived by Frank, he knows it because Frank attempted to deceive him unsuccessfully. One thing tommy didn't take for granted is Frank the Wolf determination to kill him. Many times Frank the wolf attempted to kill Tommy but Tommy had the upper hand in the desperate move to kill Tommy he climbed the chimney and got char and eventually died.
Furthermore, the defense explains to the jury that Tommy is the type of citizen that cape Forest needs to deter the bullies and make this town an example among other. Tommy is a hero not a murderer, the defense took a shot at the system for allowing Frank the wolf to killed the two brothers without being arrested and finally got justice from the youngest of the three brothers. The defense reiterated many times the slogan that Tommy is a hero and not a criminal and that they urged the jury to make the right call if they want their town to be safe and example because if the jury doesn't make the right judgement in this matter they could be the next victim, the defense reminded the jury that there are still characters like Vern the Leopard out there and his kind that are monitoring this trial very close and that a bad judgement on the jury part can bolster these characters in carrying on the same criminal activities.
Now it is the turn of the jury to have a word, they received strict guidance from Judge Elephant King in deliberating this matter. The jury deliberated for days and finally came up with a non guilty verdict. After the trial the jury explained the factors that played an important role in their decisions. First they talked about the character that the prosecution called to make their case, they called him untrustworthy and having an agenda. Second none of Frank the Wolf family was present at the trial which according to the jury said something about Frank the wolf character. Speaking to their acquittal verdict with respect to Tommy, the jury affirmed that they had a sense of honesty from Tommy and that they really believe that he acted in self defense and this mark the end of this painful to watch trial full of anger one hand and guilt on the other.
Reporting live from the hallways of the district court of Cape Forest Djibril Dosso Justice channel.
Saturday, October 4, 2008
A Miracle Pertaining to The Three Little Pigs
Once, there was a mysterious man who murdered two of the three little pigs in Midwood forest. That was just a flashback, but today is the day the mysterious man will be testified and be prosecuted under any charges by the court’s order.
Hi, I’m Tony Peng, live from Iowa City court in Iowa. I’m here today with Mimi the only survivor of the three little pigs and she is our only hope to testify this mysterious man for clues leading toward the murder of the 2 little pigs (Jenny and Sammy). Mimi (the youngest of the three little pigs) will be joining us throughout this mysterious event to find evidence if the mysterious man killed the 2 little pigs. As of right now, we’re about to see the arrival of the mysterious man in just a few minutes. We’ll take a short break and we’ll be right back. So, stay tuned.
We’re back and I’m here with Mimi and the story begins right now. The mysterious man has a name called B. Bad Wolfe. The Wolfe will be telling us everything he knows starting with a stormy evening in Midwood Forest. I have a clip to show everyone what really happened last night.
Reporter: (Mimi tells us what happened) It was a stormy night in Midwood forest; we were all living happily together. We all prepared ourselves some food. We all played and laughed but not long till the wind started to blow heavily. That night, after our fun time, we all went to sleep. The B. Bad Wolfe has his home a few blocks away from the three little pig’s home. During his spare time, he reads many different stories about animals. That night B. Bad Wolfe has just finished his food and starred out the window seeing the wind whispering through his ears and the only visible house he sees is the three little pig’s house. The wind was still blowing heavily and Wolfe was a bit tired and wanted to relax a bit so he did. Few hours passed, 2 0f the 3 little pigs were asleep but Mimi was still awake.
Reporter: (Wolfe what happened) I was sleeping and dreamt about the three little pigs in wonderland. I fell in love with the smallest pig and the two other pigs would hit me or be mad at me all the time. Those two weren’t as friendly as this younger one. Then, we had a chat together and said to the little pig. I’ll tell you a secret. Come closer if you want to find out.
The next morning, the wind stopped blowing and the sun was so bright and was shining across midland forest. The two little pigs were all having breakfast but Mimi was still asleep. During that past evening, Mimi dreamt about a wolf taking care of her when the two little pigs were rude and disrespectful whenever she asks them for food. She felt passionate about the Wolfe than the two little pigs. The next morning, when Mimi’s finally awake, she went for a walk around the trails in the outskirt of her house. Wolfe was reading novels in front of his house and then the two met and they had jubilation and were amiable to each other. He told Mimi that when I met you, I wouldn’t feel lonely anymore and I have great power and strength to protect you. Just like you, the other two pigs aren’t as nice and affable but they do tend to left you out of the party a lot. They always cared for themselves. I bought you a teddy bear when we’re really young and we haven’t seen each other since our adolescence.
Later that night, Mimi went back to her house and started to tell the other two pigs what had just happened. Few hours later, wind chills tend to get bigger and Wolfe sat by his fireplace thinking about Mimi and then cooked himself some food before he could move on. Then he wrote a letter and the next morning there was a mail in the three little pig’s house. Mimi read the letter and was thinking which route she should choose. The two pigs were happy among each other and then, Mimi went back to Wolfe’s home and said something to him. Wolfe listened and a strong hurricane has arrived during that evening. Wolfe house was covered with bricks but the little pig’s house was covered with wood. Mimi was really young and she didn’t know who her parents were. When a strong blizzard wind came, Mimi was sleeping over at Wolfe’s home feeling warm and cozy. The 2 little bears went stuck in their home and never thought these walls could deteriorate. The next morning, Mimi was awake and Wolfe was along with having breakfast. Then, she went for a visit to the pig’s home and she yelled ahhhh!!!. What has just happened was just depressing and the 2 little pigs were dead by that time. The clip ends here.
We’re back here at the court in Iowa, the question is should Wolfe be punished for tricking her into Wolfe’s house or did he do the right thing to protecting her from the other two pigs. This is the question we’re still trying to figure out and what is actually going through Wolfe’s mind.
This has been a terrific day for us. I’m here with Mimi and Wolfe. Thanks for tuning in for this exclusive news and we’ll bring you more details in the future pertaining to the question above. I’m live from Iowa City Court. See you next time.
Hi, I’m Tony Peng, live from Iowa City court in Iowa. I’m here today with Mimi the only survivor of the three little pigs and she is our only hope to testify this mysterious man for clues leading toward the murder of the 2 little pigs (Jenny and Sammy). Mimi (the youngest of the three little pigs) will be joining us throughout this mysterious event to find evidence if the mysterious man killed the 2 little pigs. As of right now, we’re about to see the arrival of the mysterious man in just a few minutes. We’ll take a short break and we’ll be right back. So, stay tuned.
We’re back and I’m here with Mimi and the story begins right now. The mysterious man has a name called B. Bad Wolfe. The Wolfe will be telling us everything he knows starting with a stormy evening in Midwood Forest. I have a clip to show everyone what really happened last night.
Reporter: (Mimi tells us what happened) It was a stormy night in Midwood forest; we were all living happily together. We all prepared ourselves some food. We all played and laughed but not long till the wind started to blow heavily. That night, after our fun time, we all went to sleep. The B. Bad Wolfe has his home a few blocks away from the three little pig’s home. During his spare time, he reads many different stories about animals. That night B. Bad Wolfe has just finished his food and starred out the window seeing the wind whispering through his ears and the only visible house he sees is the three little pig’s house. The wind was still blowing heavily and Wolfe was a bit tired and wanted to relax a bit so he did. Few hours passed, 2 0f the 3 little pigs were asleep but Mimi was still awake.
Reporter: (Wolfe what happened) I was sleeping and dreamt about the three little pigs in wonderland. I fell in love with the smallest pig and the two other pigs would hit me or be mad at me all the time. Those two weren’t as friendly as this younger one. Then, we had a chat together and said to the little pig. I’ll tell you a secret. Come closer if you want to find out.
The next morning, the wind stopped blowing and the sun was so bright and was shining across midland forest. The two little pigs were all having breakfast but Mimi was still asleep. During that past evening, Mimi dreamt about a wolf taking care of her when the two little pigs were rude and disrespectful whenever she asks them for food. She felt passionate about the Wolfe than the two little pigs. The next morning, when Mimi’s finally awake, she went for a walk around the trails in the outskirt of her house. Wolfe was reading novels in front of his house and then the two met and they had jubilation and were amiable to each other. He told Mimi that when I met you, I wouldn’t feel lonely anymore and I have great power and strength to protect you. Just like you, the other two pigs aren’t as nice and affable but they do tend to left you out of the party a lot. They always cared for themselves. I bought you a teddy bear when we’re really young and we haven’t seen each other since our adolescence.
Later that night, Mimi went back to her house and started to tell the other two pigs what had just happened. Few hours later, wind chills tend to get bigger and Wolfe sat by his fireplace thinking about Mimi and then cooked himself some food before he could move on. Then he wrote a letter and the next morning there was a mail in the three little pig’s house. Mimi read the letter and was thinking which route she should choose. The two pigs were happy among each other and then, Mimi went back to Wolfe’s home and said something to him. Wolfe listened and a strong hurricane has arrived during that evening. Wolfe house was covered with bricks but the little pig’s house was covered with wood. Mimi was really young and she didn’t know who her parents were. When a strong blizzard wind came, Mimi was sleeping over at Wolfe’s home feeling warm and cozy. The 2 little bears went stuck in their home and never thought these walls could deteriorate. The next morning, Mimi was awake and Wolfe was along with having breakfast. Then, she went for a visit to the pig’s home and she yelled ahhhh!!!. What has just happened was just depressing and the 2 little pigs were dead by that time. The clip ends here.
We’re back here at the court in Iowa, the question is should Wolfe be punished for tricking her into Wolfe’s house or did he do the right thing to protecting her from the other two pigs. This is the question we’re still trying to figure out and what is actually going through Wolfe’s mind.
This has been a terrific day for us. I’m here with Mimi and Wolfe. Thanks for tuning in for this exclusive news and we’ll bring you more details in the future pertaining to the question above. I’m live from Iowa City Court. See you next time.
Friday, October 3, 2008
B.Badd Wolfe
This is Eyewitness news @ 5 with Sidney A. Grimes reporting live from the Queens County court house where one B. Badd Wolfe is being charged with the disappearance & possible homicide of 2 persons.
Sources have it that the prosecution has found an eyewitness who is willing to testify against Mr. Wolfe. It is believed that this source will make a surprise appearance today & will link Mr. Wolfe to the disappearance of one Tastie M. Littlepigg & her sister Plumjucie M. Littlepigg.
[Reporter is standing in corridor outside of court proceeding]
[Reporter notices commotion –doors swing open- & outcomes Mr. Wolfe in handcuffs escorted by court officers on his way to his holding cell.]
Reporter: Mr. Wolfe…Mr. Wolfe…is it true? Did you kidnap & murder the Littlepigg sisters?
Mr. Wolfe: I am innocent! I am being framed! They have no proof of anything. I don’t know or have never met nobody named Littlepigg.
Reporter: But how do you explain the overwhelming evidence against you? I mean if I’m correct you suddenly gained 150lbs…. “overnight.” Then according to the transcript hair follicles matching your DNA were found at the homes of the Littlepigg sisters. How do you explain that?
Mr. Wolfe: This is water weight…I went fishing and I kinda fell in the water and swallowed some water when I tried to catch some fish.
Reporter: Mr. Wolfe you did not answer my question. How does that explain the hair found at the scene of the alleged crime?
Mr. Wolfe: I tell ya it is a trap. I am being framed because of my protruding jaw line & my longhair. Its discrimination I tell ya…just down right discrimination.
Reporter: Well you’ve just heard his side of the story & if you ask me… “Something smells fishy.”
[In comes surprise witness through the court house entrance doors & proceeds with heavy police escort accompanied by her attorney – one Ms. “Lukkie A. Littlepigg]
[Ms. Lukkie spots reporter & immediately begins to explain sordid details]
Ms. Lukkie: I want everyone to know that I saw everything. Mr. Wolfe went to my sister Tastie’ home & tried to deceivingly talk his way in. When Tastie told him that he couldn’t come in, he started “huffing & puffing” [Yelling, Cussing, & banging] on the door & eventually broke into the house and I haven’t seen Tastie since. Next thing you know, I was on the phone with my 2nd sister Plumjucie when I overheard a commotion while I was telling her about Tastie & heard Mr. Wolfe’ voice in the background & then the phone went dead.
I want the world to know that this man did something evil & he is going to pay if I don’t find out what happened to my sisters. He must be held accountable or else someone better lock me up before I get my hands on him.
[Court is in session – trial begins & then case is brought before jury]
Prosecutor: Mr. Wolfe the evidence against you is overwhelming. You stating during your cross-examination that you gained the extra weight fishing but yet you do not own a fishing reel. I find this puzzling. The state of New York will prove beyond a shadow of doubt that you & only you were responsible for the disappearance of Ms. Tastie & Plumjucie Littlepigg.
Mr. Wolfe: Impossible. There is no way or nothing you can do to prove I had anything to do with anything. I ain’t done nothing. You just blowing smoke. Ha-ha-ha- you bore me.
[Little did Mr. Wolfe know- apparently while he was resting, “going on a hunch,” the prosecutor spiked his food with an elephant type laxative into lunch that would kick in just about now…]
Mr. Wolfe: (to his lawyer…) “I don’t feel so well.” I think I better go the restroom but not with any of you nosey coppers ya see…
[Of course he was escorted but allowed to enter by himself while the court officers stayed outside. Little did he know that the prosecution overheard his request & unbeknownst to Mr. Wolfe they had already strategically installed cameras just outside the restroom being monitored by the Judge & jury right inside the courtroom]
As expected, there was an awful scream & howl & outcome Ms. Tastie & her sister Plumjucie dashing out of the restroom & the a very exhausted & sore Mr. Wolfe saying, “I’m give up, I’m guilty” can someone please get me a Doctor?
Reporter: So there you have it. 3 sisters reunited after a terrible ordeal & one sore Wolfe who will remember – “what goes in must come out.”
…Reporting live from the steps of the Queens County court house, your roving Eyewitness News reporter, Sidney A. Grimes.
Have a safe & happy day.
Sources have it that the prosecution has found an eyewitness who is willing to testify against Mr. Wolfe. It is believed that this source will make a surprise appearance today & will link Mr. Wolfe to the disappearance of one Tastie M. Littlepigg & her sister Plumjucie M. Littlepigg.
[Reporter is standing in corridor outside of court proceeding]
[Reporter notices commotion –doors swing open- & outcomes Mr. Wolfe in handcuffs escorted by court officers on his way to his holding cell.]
Reporter: Mr. Wolfe…Mr. Wolfe…is it true? Did you kidnap & murder the Littlepigg sisters?
Mr. Wolfe: I am innocent! I am being framed! They have no proof of anything. I don’t know or have never met nobody named Littlepigg.
Reporter: But how do you explain the overwhelming evidence against you? I mean if I’m correct you suddenly gained 150lbs…. “overnight.” Then according to the transcript hair follicles matching your DNA were found at the homes of the Littlepigg sisters. How do you explain that?
Mr. Wolfe: This is water weight…I went fishing and I kinda fell in the water and swallowed some water when I tried to catch some fish.
Reporter: Mr. Wolfe you did not answer my question. How does that explain the hair found at the scene of the alleged crime?
Mr. Wolfe: I tell ya it is a trap. I am being framed because of my protruding jaw line & my longhair. Its discrimination I tell ya…just down right discrimination.
Reporter: Well you’ve just heard his side of the story & if you ask me… “Something smells fishy.”
[In comes surprise witness through the court house entrance doors & proceeds with heavy police escort accompanied by her attorney – one Ms. “Lukkie A. Littlepigg]
[Ms. Lukkie spots reporter & immediately begins to explain sordid details]
Ms. Lukkie: I want everyone to know that I saw everything. Mr. Wolfe went to my sister Tastie’ home & tried to deceivingly talk his way in. When Tastie told him that he couldn’t come in, he started “huffing & puffing” [Yelling, Cussing, & banging] on the door & eventually broke into the house and I haven’t seen Tastie since. Next thing you know, I was on the phone with my 2nd sister Plumjucie when I overheard a commotion while I was telling her about Tastie & heard Mr. Wolfe’ voice in the background & then the phone went dead.
I want the world to know that this man did something evil & he is going to pay if I don’t find out what happened to my sisters. He must be held accountable or else someone better lock me up before I get my hands on him.
[Court is in session – trial begins & then case is brought before jury]
Prosecutor: Mr. Wolfe the evidence against you is overwhelming. You stating during your cross-examination that you gained the extra weight fishing but yet you do not own a fishing reel. I find this puzzling. The state of New York will prove beyond a shadow of doubt that you & only you were responsible for the disappearance of Ms. Tastie & Plumjucie Littlepigg.
Mr. Wolfe: Impossible. There is no way or nothing you can do to prove I had anything to do with anything. I ain’t done nothing. You just blowing smoke. Ha-ha-ha- you bore me.
[Little did Mr. Wolfe know- apparently while he was resting, “going on a hunch,” the prosecutor spiked his food with an elephant type laxative into lunch that would kick in just about now…]
Mr. Wolfe: (to his lawyer…) “I don’t feel so well.” I think I better go the restroom but not with any of you nosey coppers ya see…
[Of course he was escorted but allowed to enter by himself while the court officers stayed outside. Little did he know that the prosecution overheard his request & unbeknownst to Mr. Wolfe they had already strategically installed cameras just outside the restroom being monitored by the Judge & jury right inside the courtroom]
As expected, there was an awful scream & howl & outcome Ms. Tastie & her sister Plumjucie dashing out of the restroom & the a very exhausted & sore Mr. Wolfe saying, “I’m give up, I’m guilty” can someone please get me a Doctor?
Reporter: So there you have it. 3 sisters reunited after a terrible ordeal & one sore Wolfe who will remember – “what goes in must come out.”
…Reporting live from the steps of the Queens County court house, your roving Eyewitness News reporter, Sidney A. Grimes.
Have a safe & happy day.
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Who's Innocent?
As you may all know, the prosecution of Little Pig has been an ongoing trial. The family of Wolf have been doing all they can to get Little Pig the death sentence, saying the murder of their son was unjust and unnecessary. They are working with the prosecutor to find anything in Little Pig’s past that they can use against him. The defense is trying to prove that Little Pig was in his rights when he murdered Wolf. What do you think? Who’s right? And who’s wrong? Is Little Pig guilty?
There are always two sides of the story, but which is true? Looking back at Wolf’s history and track record, I’m going to have to defend Little Pig’s story. Little Pig is a model citizen and has a clean record, this incident being his first time in any kind of trouble. Wolf had no right trespassing onto Little Pig’s property when Little Pig clearly did not want him around. Wolf killed Little Pig’s two brothers and was coming to Little Pig to finish off his family. The Pig and Wolf family have been enemies for a long time but nobody knew the violence would escalate to this.
The Pig family has been able to fight off the Wolf family for a long time but after the death of Mother Pig and Father Pig, the Little Pigs have been having trouble maintaining the distance with the Wolf family. All the turmoil started when the Wolf family wanted the Pig family’s land. In order to stop this, the Pig brothers built three separate houses on their property. This pushed Wolf to the edge and caused all this violence. After destroying two of the houses and killing Little Pig’s brothers, Wolf made numerous failed attempts at destroying Little Pig’s house. Little pig had no choice but to kill Wolf before Wolf killed him.
Hopefully the jury sees that Little Pig did this to save his own life and it was for survival. Little Pig should not get the death sentence and should be let go considering this was an act of defense. All the facts presented, I think there is no other outcome. But, hopefully, the Wolfs leave Little Pig alone after all of this is over. I wouldn’t be surprised if they get their own revenge when Little Pig is let go.
There are always two sides of the story, but which is true? Looking back at Wolf’s history and track record, I’m going to have to defend Little Pig’s story. Little Pig is a model citizen and has a clean record, this incident being his first time in any kind of trouble. Wolf had no right trespassing onto Little Pig’s property when Little Pig clearly did not want him around. Wolf killed Little Pig’s two brothers and was coming to Little Pig to finish off his family. The Pig and Wolf family have been enemies for a long time but nobody knew the violence would escalate to this.
The Pig family has been able to fight off the Wolf family for a long time but after the death of Mother Pig and Father Pig, the Little Pigs have been having trouble maintaining the distance with the Wolf family. All the turmoil started when the Wolf family wanted the Pig family’s land. In order to stop this, the Pig brothers built three separate houses on their property. This pushed Wolf to the edge and caused all this violence. After destroying two of the houses and killing Little Pig’s brothers, Wolf made numerous failed attempts at destroying Little Pig’s house. Little pig had no choice but to kill Wolf before Wolf killed him.
Hopefully the jury sees that Little Pig did this to save his own life and it was for survival. Little Pig should not get the death sentence and should be let go considering this was an act of defense. All the facts presented, I think there is no other outcome. But, hopefully, the Wolfs leave Little Pig alone after all of this is over. I wouldn’t be surprised if they get their own revenge when Little Pig is let go.
Monday, September 29, 2008
The Truth behind Mr. Bigbad Wolf’s Murder
Friday, September 26th. The District Court of Merry Woods was in session today over the murder of Mr. Bigbad Wolf, last May, in the neighborhood of Tiny Shacks. Mr. Wolf’s remains were found by the garbage-animal, Mr. Jackal, when he picked up the day’s trash from behind Mr. Whirly Pig’s lovely cottage, in Tiny Shacks. Mr. Jackal immediately called up the Panther-cops of Merry Woods, and Mr. Pig was held for questioning. However, when he related details about how Mr. Wolf had eaten his two siblings, and that he ate Mr. Wolf in self-defense, Mr. Whirly Pig was allowed to leave the Shanklin Police Station. However, the Panther-cops had warned Mr. Pig not to leave the vicinity of Merry Woods.
This case had puzzled the Panther-cops, Magpie-lawyers and Owl-judges for the past four months. This was because neither Mr. Bigbad Wolf, nor any member of his pack had ever committed such a crime. They had never eaten up any of the animals of Merry Woods. This was a heinous crime, punishable by death. All animals are encouraged to seek sustenance outside the township. Last week, however, a witness who showed up, brought about a completely new insight into the case.
Mr. Shylock Scrooge who had been overseas in the Amazon rainforest, returned after many months of seeking natural resources for his business. He was a key witness for Mr. Wolf’s lawyer, Mr. Mad Magpie. Mr. Shylock Scrooge has been a respectable member of this community for almost half a century, when he left his world to live in ours. He owns Merry Woods’ largest construction company, Crazy Construction, providing employment to over 40% of the animals here. His company has been in business for thirty years. His employees include elephants, zebras, horses, wild buffaloes and hawks.
Mr. Scrooge shocked the court by stating that he knew all three members of the Pig family. He said he met them when they had newly arrived into Merry Woods. According to Mr. Scrooge, Curly, Surly and Whirly had left their mother’s home in the village of Sheepish Fields, and, being poets, had wandered the countryside in search of fairs. They thought they could recite their poems there. They found that Merry Woods had many kinds of fairs held here, so they wanted to live here. They loved the neighborhood of Tiny Shacks, but needed shell-money and materials to build their homes here. So they sought Mr. Scrooge. Curly borrowed a bundle of straw, Surly took a bundle of furze and Whirly took a load of bricks. Mr. Scrooge presented IOU’s in court that had been stamped with each Pig’s hoof-print, in recognition of their debt. The Owl-judge duly made note of this important piece of evidence.
Then, after five months, when the three Pigs had not paid up, Mr. Scrooge hired Mr. Wolf, his finest collection agent, to talk to the Pigs to persuade them to come up with some kind of a payment plan to repay their debt. Mr. Wolf went to Curly’s home but the Pig refused to talk to him, telling him so in rhythm. Then Mr. Wolf threatened to blow away his house, not expecting it to happen. However, when Mr. Pig did not open his door to talk to the Wolf, he blew and the house did fall down. Mr. Wolf left the scene of the crime immediately. Then he went to Surly Pig’s house and exactly the same thing happened, including the Pig talking in rhyme to the Wolf. Mr. Wolf thought a house made of sticks would not break down if he blows, so he carried out his threat, but the house blew away. Mr. Wolf again, ran away. Then Mr. Wolf went to Whirly Pig’s house, hoping to get him to pay up. However, the Pig did not open up, and he could not blow the house down, so he asked the Pig if he would like to go get turnips from Mr. Smith’s field. However, the Pig outsmarted him and went there early, to avoid meeting Mr. Wolf. He then suggested Merry Garden’s apple trees, which was where Mr. Scrooge lived. Again Mr. Pig outsmarted Wolf and left before Wolf could talk to him. Wolf then suggested going to the fair at Shanklin, which the Pig knew was where the police-station was. He deliberately rolled with the butter churn towards Mr. Wolf, hoping to hurt him. Mr. Wolf ran away. Then, as a last resort, Mr. Wolf tried to climb down the chimney to get to talk to Mr. Pig, at which point Whirly Pig put a pot of boiling water under him, cooked him and ate him.
Mr. Scrooge stated that he knew there was a loitering Bobcat in Merry Woods, who came from neighboring Frightening Forest, who was looking for work here. He may be the perpetrator of the Pig’s murders.
The jury has gone into deliberation and we will find out tomorrow if indeed Mr. Bigbad Wolf is acquitted of his alleged crimes and if Mr. Whirly Pig is taken into custody.
This case had puzzled the Panther-cops, Magpie-lawyers and Owl-judges for the past four months. This was because neither Mr. Bigbad Wolf, nor any member of his pack had ever committed such a crime. They had never eaten up any of the animals of Merry Woods. This was a heinous crime, punishable by death. All animals are encouraged to seek sustenance outside the township. Last week, however, a witness who showed up, brought about a completely new insight into the case.
Mr. Shylock Scrooge who had been overseas in the Amazon rainforest, returned after many months of seeking natural resources for his business. He was a key witness for Mr. Wolf’s lawyer, Mr. Mad Magpie. Mr. Shylock Scrooge has been a respectable member of this community for almost half a century, when he left his world to live in ours. He owns Merry Woods’ largest construction company, Crazy Construction, providing employment to over 40% of the animals here. His company has been in business for thirty years. His employees include elephants, zebras, horses, wild buffaloes and hawks.
Mr. Scrooge shocked the court by stating that he knew all three members of the Pig family. He said he met them when they had newly arrived into Merry Woods. According to Mr. Scrooge, Curly, Surly and Whirly had left their mother’s home in the village of Sheepish Fields, and, being poets, had wandered the countryside in search of fairs. They thought they could recite their poems there. They found that Merry Woods had many kinds of fairs held here, so they wanted to live here. They loved the neighborhood of Tiny Shacks, but needed shell-money and materials to build their homes here. So they sought Mr. Scrooge. Curly borrowed a bundle of straw, Surly took a bundle of furze and Whirly took a load of bricks. Mr. Scrooge presented IOU’s in court that had been stamped with each Pig’s hoof-print, in recognition of their debt. The Owl-judge duly made note of this important piece of evidence.
Then, after five months, when the three Pigs had not paid up, Mr. Scrooge hired Mr. Wolf, his finest collection agent, to talk to the Pigs to persuade them to come up with some kind of a payment plan to repay their debt. Mr. Wolf went to Curly’s home but the Pig refused to talk to him, telling him so in rhythm. Then Mr. Wolf threatened to blow away his house, not expecting it to happen. However, when Mr. Pig did not open his door to talk to the Wolf, he blew and the house did fall down. Mr. Wolf left the scene of the crime immediately. Then he went to Surly Pig’s house and exactly the same thing happened, including the Pig talking in rhyme to the Wolf. Mr. Wolf thought a house made of sticks would not break down if he blows, so he carried out his threat, but the house blew away. Mr. Wolf again, ran away. Then Mr. Wolf went to Whirly Pig’s house, hoping to get him to pay up. However, the Pig did not open up, and he could not blow the house down, so he asked the Pig if he would like to go get turnips from Mr. Smith’s field. However, the Pig outsmarted him and went there early, to avoid meeting Mr. Wolf. He then suggested Merry Garden’s apple trees, which was where Mr. Scrooge lived. Again Mr. Pig outsmarted Wolf and left before Wolf could talk to him. Wolf then suggested going to the fair at Shanklin, which the Pig knew was where the police-station was. He deliberately rolled with the butter churn towards Mr. Wolf, hoping to hurt him. Mr. Wolf ran away. Then, as a last resort, Mr. Wolf tried to climb down the chimney to get to talk to Mr. Pig, at which point Whirly Pig put a pot of boiling water under him, cooked him and ate him.
Mr. Scrooge stated that he knew there was a loitering Bobcat in Merry Woods, who came from neighboring Frightening Forest, who was looking for work here. He may be the perpetrator of the Pig’s murders.
The jury has gone into deliberation and we will find out tomorrow if indeed Mr. Bigbad Wolf is acquitted of his alleged crimes and if Mr. Whirly Pig is taken into custody.
Saturday, September 27, 2008
Guilty!
Big Bad Wolf was found guilty today by a jury of 12 at the Disneyland Town Court. Mr. Wolf was found guilty of attempted murder against the three little innocent pigs. Big Bad was taken into custody a few months ago when he tried to kill Practical Pig, the youngest of the three brothers. Practical a very wise little pig was clever enough to inform the authorities that Big Bad Wolf was trying to eat him, and so together with the authorities conjured up a plan to get Big Bad. The next time Big Bad tried to get Practical out of his house he was caught.
During the trial the prosecutors did an excellent job at convincing the jurors the Mr. Wolf was greedy and was a con artist at this best. When Little Red Riding Hood and her grandmother came to testify against him there was no doubt that he was a very deceiving wolf. Little Red Riding Hood told the story of how Big Bad locked her grandmother in the closet and disguise himself as her to try and fool her. The whole court room was shocked. Mr. Wolf, quick to his feet yelled out "lies all lies". Whispers were heard all around the court until the judge had to put everyone in order.
Big Bad was trying to con his way into proving his innocence. He was going to court in suits, trying to speak softly, and remaining calm when others would against him. He even tried to help a family of little pigs built a brick house so that others from his clan won't be able to harm them. However, he lost his temper when Practical was testifying against him. Practical told the court that he was able to escape Big Bad because he was smarter than him. Big Bad turn red and shouted "I'll kill you. You'll see. Soon you'll be inside my belly because I win I always win" while starting to get up from his seat. The cops immediately hold him and got him out of the court all the while Big Bad Wolf was starting to laugh hysterically.
When the verdict was announce Mr. Wolf seemed indifferent. He was his head down. Mean while Practical and his two other brother Fiddler and Piper were jumping up and down for joy. When they took him away Mr. Wolf told the three little pigs that they had not seen the last of him.
During the trial the prosecutors did an excellent job at convincing the jurors the Mr. Wolf was greedy and was a con artist at this best. When Little Red Riding Hood and her grandmother came to testify against him there was no doubt that he was a very deceiving wolf. Little Red Riding Hood told the story of how Big Bad locked her grandmother in the closet and disguise himself as her to try and fool her. The whole court room was shocked. Mr. Wolf, quick to his feet yelled out "lies all lies". Whispers were heard all around the court until the judge had to put everyone in order.
Big Bad was trying to con his way into proving his innocence. He was going to court in suits, trying to speak softly, and remaining calm when others would against him. He even tried to help a family of little pigs built a brick house so that others from his clan won't be able to harm them. However, he lost his temper when Practical was testifying against him. Practical told the court that he was able to escape Big Bad because he was smarter than him. Big Bad turn red and shouted "I'll kill you. You'll see. Soon you'll be inside my belly because I win I always win" while starting to get up from his seat. The cops immediately hold him and got him out of the court all the while Big Bad Wolf was starting to laugh hysterically.
When the verdict was announce Mr. Wolf seemed indifferent. He was his head down. Mean while Practical and his two other brother Fiddler and Piper were jumping up and down for joy. When they took him away Mr. Wolf told the three little pigs that they had not seen the last of him.
Pig Killer Alleges Innocence.
The Ticktacker, a college media publication-- Alexander T. Wolf, a wolf accused of murdering (and eating) of two of the Three Little Pig brothers, Ike and Kyle, and an attempted murder of the third pig , Eric, denied murder and alleged his innocence in the murder trial. His testimony is transcribed below.
"I am here today to tell you the true story. I am sure I can prove my innocence. Let me make this point clear, first. I did not kill the two little pigs. I happened to eat them, but I had a just reason to do so. As to the third pig, I was acting in self-defense. Here’s the true story.
It was a really windy day. I didn’t want to go out, but I needed to go ask the first pig Ike to pay me back 100 animal dollars. As you may know, he was really poor. He didn’t even have enough money to buy a bundle of straw, so he begged a local farmer for it and built a house. I felt pity for him, so when he visited me and said to me, “Please lend me some money. I will pay it back in a month,” I lent him 100 animal dollars. I remember at the time, he jokingly said, “You can eat me if I don’t keep the promise.” Of course, I told him I wouldn’t do that with a smile. However, after one month had passed, he didn’t come to pay it back. So I decided to go to his house in spite of the strong wind. When I arrived at his house and asked him to open the door, he said, “No, no. I won’t open the door.” While I was at lost for words, a strong wind blew and broke down his house. He was crushed to death. Now his joke became true, so I ate him. Then I decided to go to his brother Kyle’s house to tell Ike’s death. When I arrived at his house, I said, “Hi Kyle. Let me come in. I have something to tell you about your brother.” He said, “No, you can’t come in. I have nothing to be told about Ike. I don’t care about him!” I got angry at his thoughtlessness for his brother. Then a blast of wind blew in again, and his house made of sticks fell down. He was dead, so I ate him. Then I went to the third pig Eric’s house. I also lent him 100 animal dollars a long time ago, and he was excusing himself for the late repayment. I knew he had not had enough money to pay it back, so I asked him to go pick up turnips and apples to sell at a local fair. But he didn’t take my advice and ate them up on his own. I barely put up with him and asked him to go to a fair hoping that he would be motivated to open a booth. But his response to my efforts was to frighten me. Can you believe this? You may not know this, but wolves can die when they are scared. Because no one tries to frighten wolves, wolves are so unused to surprise that they can die. When I saw Eric’s face filled with pleasure of frighten me, I thought he would do that again, so I tried to kill him for the right of self-defense. Does anyone still think I’m guilty? I hope justice will be done."
"I am here today to tell you the true story. I am sure I can prove my innocence. Let me make this point clear, first. I did not kill the two little pigs. I happened to eat them, but I had a just reason to do so. As to the third pig, I was acting in self-defense. Here’s the true story.
It was a really windy day. I didn’t want to go out, but I needed to go ask the first pig Ike to pay me back 100 animal dollars. As you may know, he was really poor. He didn’t even have enough money to buy a bundle of straw, so he begged a local farmer for it and built a house. I felt pity for him, so when he visited me and said to me, “Please lend me some money. I will pay it back in a month,” I lent him 100 animal dollars. I remember at the time, he jokingly said, “You can eat me if I don’t keep the promise.” Of course, I told him I wouldn’t do that with a smile. However, after one month had passed, he didn’t come to pay it back. So I decided to go to his house in spite of the strong wind. When I arrived at his house and asked him to open the door, he said, “No, no. I won’t open the door.” While I was at lost for words, a strong wind blew and broke down his house. He was crushed to death. Now his joke became true, so I ate him. Then I decided to go to his brother Kyle’s house to tell Ike’s death. When I arrived at his house, I said, “Hi Kyle. Let me come in. I have something to tell you about your brother.” He said, “No, you can’t come in. I have nothing to be told about Ike. I don’t care about him!” I got angry at his thoughtlessness for his brother. Then a blast of wind blew in again, and his house made of sticks fell down. He was dead, so I ate him. Then I went to the third pig Eric’s house. I also lent him 100 animal dollars a long time ago, and he was excusing himself for the late repayment. I knew he had not had enough money to pay it back, so I asked him to go pick up turnips and apples to sell at a local fair. But he didn’t take my advice and ate them up on his own. I barely put up with him and asked him to go to a fair hoping that he would be motivated to open a booth. But his response to my efforts was to frighten me. Can you believe this? You may not know this, but wolves can die when they are scared. Because no one tries to frighten wolves, wolves are so unused to surprise that they can die. When I saw Eric’s face filled with pleasure of frighten me, I thought he would do that again, so I tried to kill him for the right of self-defense. Does anyone still think I’m guilty? I hope justice will be done."
Once upon a time somewhere in Manhatforest three little pigs worked in real estate. Mike, Frank and John were brothers and they called their company Super Brothers. The economy of that time was very unstable due to Wall Parkway crisis and other external problems of United Woods; therefore real estate went down and the brothers closed their company. Even one bedroom burrows cost so much money that inhabitants of Manhatforest had to lived under trees. However, the pigs were young and enthusiastic and they came up with an idea to open totally different business as restaurants. The little pigs decided to do their on their own and open three restaurant in different locations. Mike opened McAcorn, Frank opened Burger Pig, and John opened White Farm.
Everything was great, they ran their businesses and enjoyed their lives. Mike’s place was located by a river which was a wonderful as he thought. Animals from all over the woods came their to drink some water, so Mike decided not to spend money on advertising. He was so confident in his success so didn’t care about any investment in his business to improve it. However, it was so good only in the beginning because one day beavers moved to the river and built there their weirs that made water to disappear. The animals stopped going to the river and restaurant met its worst days. All employees quit and Mike stayed there alone and broken.
In contrast, Mike’s brother Frank realized that hid Burger Pig was located by a glade; therefore, he worked on the advertising very hard by hiring the best promoters, pr managers and did it well. All inhabitants of the Manhatwoods found out about the place and wanted to visit it. More and more customers came to his place but there were so many that one day they turned the glade into desert. They ruined everything around the restaurant. Frank spent all his money on commercial and didn’t hired extra workers to clean environment of his place. After that lee and less animals visited Burger Pig. Neither ads nor food helped Frank to capture customers attention. Moreover, his employees were so wealthy in the beginning so they stared drinking and became rude to their customers.
John’s White Farm was located somewhere at the edge of the woods and seemed not very successful, however John didn’t give up. He wanted to draw his customers and made it as his main goal. The only advantage he had was an oak tree by his restaurants. Birds from all over the woods gathered there and sang their songs. It look like a real good destruction but John came up with an idea to use it as an advantage. He bought karaoke system and fixed up singing competitions with different kinds of entertainment. John’s reputation went up and he was considered as the best entrepreneur of the wood. He was very loyal to his employees and they were happy to work for him. White Farm became the most popular place in the woods.
While Frank and Mike’s restaurants was facing bankruptcy White Farm was flourishing. However, one day the biggest competitor of the little pigs Wolf the owner of Apple Flies restaurant declared that pigs were not kosher so animals were better not to it in their restaurants. The pigs businesses rapidly went down. Mike and Frank closed their businesses and started working for MTA. But smart pig John went to the most popular radio station and admitted that he never sold pork in his restaurant at least because he was a pig. At the same time he protected himself from wolfs and other predators because he was a pig and could be eaten by the wolfs one day.
A few years later brothers came to John an asked him how he was able to save his business and open new restaurants. What was the answer? He gave them some lessons of good marketing and pr skills.
Everything was great, they ran their businesses and enjoyed their lives. Mike’s place was located by a river which was a wonderful as he thought. Animals from all over the woods came their to drink some water, so Mike decided not to spend money on advertising. He was so confident in his success so didn’t care about any investment in his business to improve it. However, it was so good only in the beginning because one day beavers moved to the river and built there their weirs that made water to disappear. The animals stopped going to the river and restaurant met its worst days. All employees quit and Mike stayed there alone and broken.
In contrast, Mike’s brother Frank realized that hid Burger Pig was located by a glade; therefore, he worked on the advertising very hard by hiring the best promoters, pr managers and did it well. All inhabitants of the Manhatwoods found out about the place and wanted to visit it. More and more customers came to his place but there were so many that one day they turned the glade into desert. They ruined everything around the restaurant. Frank spent all his money on commercial and didn’t hired extra workers to clean environment of his place. After that lee and less animals visited Burger Pig. Neither ads nor food helped Frank to capture customers attention. Moreover, his employees were so wealthy in the beginning so they stared drinking and became rude to their customers.
John’s White Farm was located somewhere at the edge of the woods and seemed not very successful, however John didn’t give up. He wanted to draw his customers and made it as his main goal. The only advantage he had was an oak tree by his restaurants. Birds from all over the woods gathered there and sang their songs. It look like a real good destruction but John came up with an idea to use it as an advantage. He bought karaoke system and fixed up singing competitions with different kinds of entertainment. John’s reputation went up and he was considered as the best entrepreneur of the wood. He was very loyal to his employees and they were happy to work for him. White Farm became the most popular place in the woods.
While Frank and Mike’s restaurants was facing bankruptcy White Farm was flourishing. However, one day the biggest competitor of the little pigs Wolf the owner of Apple Flies restaurant declared that pigs were not kosher so animals were better not to it in their restaurants. The pigs businesses rapidly went down. Mike and Frank closed their businesses and started working for MTA. But smart pig John went to the most popular radio station and admitted that he never sold pork in his restaurant at least because he was a pig. At the same time he protected himself from wolfs and other predators because he was a pig and could be eaten by the wolfs one day.
A few years later brothers came to John an asked him how he was able to save his business and open new restaurants. What was the answer? He gave them some lessons of good marketing and pr skills.
Once upon a time somewhere in Manhatforest three little pigs worked in real estate. Mike, Frank and John were brothers and they called their company Super Brothers. The economy of that time was very unstable due to Wall Parkway crisis and other external problems of United Woods; therefore real estate went down and the brothers closed their company. Even one bedroom burrows cost so much money that inhabitants of Manhatforest had to lived under trees. However, the pigs were young and enthusiastic and they came up with an idea to open totally different business as restaurants. The little pigs decided to do their on their own and open three restaurant in different locations. Mike opened McAcorn, Frank opened Burger Pig, and John opened White Farm.
Everything was great, they ran their businesses and enjoyed their lives. Mike’s place was located by a river which was a wonderful as he thought. Animals from all over the woods came their to drink some water, so Mike decided not to spend money on advertising. He was so confident in his success so didn’t care about any investment in his business to improve it. However, it was so good only in the beginning because one day beavers moved to the river and built there their weirs that made water to disappear. The animals stopped going to the river and restaurant met its worst days. All employees quit and Mike stayed there alone and broken.
In contrast, Mike’s brother Frank realized that hid Burger Pig was located by a glade; therefore, he worked on the advertising very hard by hiring the best promoters, pr managers and did it well. All inhabitants of the Manhatwoods found out about the place and wanted to visit it. More and more customers came to his place but there were so many that one day they turned the glade into desert. They ruined everything around the restaurant. Frank spent all his money on commercial and didn’t hired extra workers to clean environment of his place. After that lee and less animals visited Burger Pig. Neither ads nor food helped Frank to capture customers attention. Moreover, his employees were so wealthy in the beginning so they stared drinking and became rude to their customers.
John’s White Farm was located somewhere at the edge of the woods and seemed not very successful, however John didn’t give up. He wanted to draw his customers and made it as his main goal. The only advantage he had was an oak tree by his restaurants. Birds from all over the woods gathered there and sang their songs. It look like a real good destruction but John came up with an idea to use it as an advantage. He bought karaoke system and fixed up singing competitions with different kinds of entertainment. John’s reputation went up and he was considered as the best entrepreneur of the wood. He was very loyal to his employees and they were happy to work for him. White Farm became the most popular place in the woods.
While Frank and Mike’s restaurants was facing bankruptcy White Farm was flourishing. However, one day the biggest competitor of the little pigs Wolf the owner of Apple Flies restaurant declared that pigs were not kosher so animals were better not to it in their restaurants. The pigs businesses rapidly went down. Mike and Frank closed their businesses and started working for MTA. But smart pig John went to the most popular radio station and admitted that he never sold pork in his restaurant at least because he was a pig. At the same time he protected himself from wolfs and other predators because he was a pig and could be eaten by the wolfs one day.
A few years later brothers came to John an asked him how he was able to save his business and open new restaurants. What was the answer? He gave them some lessons of good marketing and pr skills.
Everything was great, they ran their businesses and enjoyed their lives. Mike’s place was located by a river which was a wonderful as he thought. Animals from all over the woods came their to drink some water, so Mike decided not to spend money on advertising. He was so confident in his success so didn’t care about any investment in his business to improve it. However, it was so good only in the beginning because one day beavers moved to the river and built there their weirs that made water to disappear. The animals stopped going to the river and restaurant met its worst days. All employees quit and Mike stayed there alone and broken.
In contrast, Mike’s brother Frank realized that hid Burger Pig was located by a glade; therefore, he worked on the advertising very hard by hiring the best promoters, pr managers and did it well. All inhabitants of the Manhatwoods found out about the place and wanted to visit it. More and more customers came to his place but there were so many that one day they turned the glade into desert. They ruined everything around the restaurant. Frank spent all his money on commercial and didn’t hired extra workers to clean environment of his place. After that lee and less animals visited Burger Pig. Neither ads nor food helped Frank to capture customers attention. Moreover, his employees were so wealthy in the beginning so they stared drinking and became rude to their customers.
John’s White Farm was located somewhere at the edge of the woods and seemed not very successful, however John didn’t give up. He wanted to draw his customers and made it as his main goal. The only advantage he had was an oak tree by his restaurants. Birds from all over the woods gathered there and sang their songs. It look like a real good destruction but John came up with an idea to use it as an advantage. He bought karaoke system and fixed up singing competitions with different kinds of entertainment. John’s reputation went up and he was considered as the best entrepreneur of the wood. He was very loyal to his employees and they were happy to work for him. White Farm became the most popular place in the woods.
While Frank and Mike’s restaurants was facing bankruptcy White Farm was flourishing. However, one day the biggest competitor of the little pigs Wolf the owner of Apple Flies restaurant declared that pigs were not kosher so animals were better not to it in their restaurants. The pigs businesses rapidly went down. Mike and Frank closed their businesses and started working for MTA. But smart pig John went to the most popular radio station and admitted that he never sold pork in his restaurant at least because he was a pig. At the same time he protected himself from wolfs and other predators because he was a pig and could be eaten by the wolfs one day.
A few years later brothers came to John an asked him how he was able to save his business and open new restaurants. What was the answer? He gave them some lessons of good marketing and pr skills.
Friday, September 26, 2008
HUNGRY WOLF ON THE HOT SEAT
Today, Thursday September 25, 2008 has marked a landmark day here in Swine Valley, USA. Trial has begun in the heated case of the Little Pigs versus the notorious Brer Wolf. Both sides have presented their vivid accounts of events past and now the jury is left to decipher truth from fiction.
Lawyers from both sides have come forth with statements to the general public at an earlier press conference today. The defense, Attorney Robert Wolvington, contends that his client is innocent of all charges, such as breaking and entering, larceny, attempted murder, and murder , just to name a few. The prosecution attorney, Hamilton Grunt asserts that a crime against animality has occurred and justice will prevail. The young, but seasoned lawyer representing the prosecution has made it clear that if one wolf is let off the hook, life as we all know it would perish.
This trial marks the final stages of a more than a decade search for the culprit responsible for the brutal murder of members to the Little Pig family. Brer Wolf allegedly coaxed his way into the houses of unsuspecting pigs, and then violently attacked, eating his victim without even chewing. His violent rage was ended after meeting his match in a house well constructed out of brick. He allegedly attempted to enter this house through the chimney and met a surprise at the end of the tunnel- a boiling pot of water. Police arrested Brer Wolf on the scene, scalded rear and all, and locked him up without bail.
All Little Pigs in the Swine Valley and surrounding regions are advised to look out for copycats- or copywolves to be PC. Deliberation resumes tomorrow and is expected to last throughout next week. We will keep you posted of any developments to the story.
Lawyers from both sides have come forth with statements to the general public at an earlier press conference today. The defense, Attorney Robert Wolvington, contends that his client is innocent of all charges, such as breaking and entering, larceny, attempted murder, and murder , just to name a few. The prosecution attorney, Hamilton Grunt asserts that a crime against animality has occurred and justice will prevail. The young, but seasoned lawyer representing the prosecution has made it clear that if one wolf is let off the hook, life as we all know it would perish.
This trial marks the final stages of a more than a decade search for the culprit responsible for the brutal murder of members to the Little Pig family. Brer Wolf allegedly coaxed his way into the houses of unsuspecting pigs, and then violently attacked, eating his victim without even chewing. His violent rage was ended after meeting his match in a house well constructed out of brick. He allegedly attempted to enter this house through the chimney and met a surprise at the end of the tunnel- a boiling pot of water. Police arrested Brer Wolf on the scene, scalded rear and all, and locked him up without bail.
All Little Pigs in the Swine Valley and surrounding regions are advised to look out for copycats- or copywolves to be PC. Deliberation resumes tomorrow and is expected to last throughout next week. We will keep you posted of any developments to the story.
The Real Face of an Ogre
Special report from Far Far Away Court TV.
Today we are covering live the first day of the trial over Piglet who is accused of a first degree intentional murder. To recap, a few months ago our Far Far Away Kingdom was shaken with the awful news of a double homicide of two Little Pigs, brothers of the defendant, and a horrifying death of Alex T. Wolf, a respected citizen of our Woods. A thorough investigation revealed the prime suspect to be Piglet, the youngest of the three Little Pigs.
In its opening statement the prosecution insisted that Mr. Wolf indeed went to the Little Pigs houses for a cup of sugar for his granny’s birthday cake. However, by the time he got there, both of the Little Pigs were already dead, that’s why he didn’t get any response from them. Due to Mr. Wolf’s medical condition (he was recovering from a severe cold) he sneezed and the houses went down. When Mr. Wolf approached the house of Piglet, the latter was already waiting for him. He framed Alex T. Wolf into getting into the chimney and intentionally left the lid of the kettle open. The prosecutor concluded that during this trial he is going to convince the jury that it was in fact Piglet who killed his two older brothers, having a large sum of insurance money as a motive, put Mr. Wolf as the one to blame, and then murdered him too on a pretense of self defense.
We now going live as the Piglet’s defense is taking a stand with its opening statement:
“Ladies and gentlemen, my name is Piggy Fox. Together with my colleagues over here at this table, I'm proud and privileged to represent this Little Pig. I get to talk to you directly about this case. This is an important time, and I am going to try my best to communicate what happened in this case.
Ladies and gentlemen, in this case you will find that Piglet did not use excessive force to protect his home by not placing a lid on the kettle, but rather was left with no alternative when Alex T. Wolf was coming down the chimney. Ladies and gentlemen I want you to understand that the little pig just shortly prior was informed that the wolf came to his brothers’ homes and stated "Let me in, Let me in, little pig or I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll blow your house in!", and after those words the wolf huffed and puffed and blew their houses in and he ate up the Little Pigs. This is not a case of excessive force, this is a case of a very frightened little pig that just learned of the death of his brother pigs and he knew he was next in line!
Remember this if you don't remember anything else I'm going to say in the next few minutes, I ask you to remember this: The Little pig saw the Wolf coming, which, as you may suppose, frightened him very much, he knew that if he was not to act the Wolf would eat him just like he did his brothers. The defendant never conspired or agreed with anyone, the defendant used a reasonable amount of force to protect himself from a deadly attack!
The prosecutors have the burden of proof beyond a reasonable doubt. In this case you will learn that there were three Little Pigs and now before you seating here today is just one! Granted, that he was the sensible Little Pig who built his home out of brick unlike his brothers who built their homes out of Straw and Sticks, but the fact still remains, the wolf found the way to get into the brick house through the chimney with the sole purpose of eating the Little Pig, leaving the Little Pig no choice but to leave a kettle with out a lid. The prosecutors have the burden of proving their claims beyond a reasonable doubt, and when this case is all over and the evidence is in, I am counting on you, members of the jury, to find that The Little Pig is innocent!”
Well, that was a very powerful statement indeed! The first day is over, the jury is taken to the MidWoods hotel, and we are left to wonder what kind of evidence will be presented from both the prosecution and defense sides at tomorrow’s session. Did Piglet really tricked us into believing he was innocent? Or was it just a self defense? Will the name of Mr. T. Wolf be cleared of allegations? Or were we all deceived by his status in the society and didn't see his real intentions?
Stay tuned for more on the story.
Coming up next: An Exclusive Interview with the Mr. Wolf’s grandmother. What is the REAL reason of the continuous hatred between wolfs and pigs? Find out in just a few minutes after a short break.
Today we are covering live the first day of the trial over Piglet who is accused of a first degree intentional murder. To recap, a few months ago our Far Far Away Kingdom was shaken with the awful news of a double homicide of two Little Pigs, brothers of the defendant, and a horrifying death of Alex T. Wolf, a respected citizen of our Woods. A thorough investigation revealed the prime suspect to be Piglet, the youngest of the three Little Pigs.
In its opening statement the prosecution insisted that Mr. Wolf indeed went to the Little Pigs houses for a cup of sugar for his granny’s birthday cake. However, by the time he got there, both of the Little Pigs were already dead, that’s why he didn’t get any response from them. Due to Mr. Wolf’s medical condition (he was recovering from a severe cold) he sneezed and the houses went down. When Mr. Wolf approached the house of Piglet, the latter was already waiting for him. He framed Alex T. Wolf into getting into the chimney and intentionally left the lid of the kettle open. The prosecutor concluded that during this trial he is going to convince the jury that it was in fact Piglet who killed his two older brothers, having a large sum of insurance money as a motive, put Mr. Wolf as the one to blame, and then murdered him too on a pretense of self defense.
We now going live as the Piglet’s defense is taking a stand with its opening statement:
“Ladies and gentlemen, my name is Piggy Fox. Together with my colleagues over here at this table, I'm proud and privileged to represent this Little Pig. I get to talk to you directly about this case. This is an important time, and I am going to try my best to communicate what happened in this case.
Ladies and gentlemen, in this case you will find that Piglet did not use excessive force to protect his home by not placing a lid on the kettle, but rather was left with no alternative when Alex T. Wolf was coming down the chimney. Ladies and gentlemen I want you to understand that the little pig just shortly prior was informed that the wolf came to his brothers’ homes and stated "Let me in, Let me in, little pig or I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll blow your house in!", and after those words the wolf huffed and puffed and blew their houses in and he ate up the Little Pigs. This is not a case of excessive force, this is a case of a very frightened little pig that just learned of the death of his brother pigs and he knew he was next in line!
Remember this if you don't remember anything else I'm going to say in the next few minutes, I ask you to remember this: The Little pig saw the Wolf coming, which, as you may suppose, frightened him very much, he knew that if he was not to act the Wolf would eat him just like he did his brothers. The defendant never conspired or agreed with anyone, the defendant used a reasonable amount of force to protect himself from a deadly attack!
The prosecutors have the burden of proof beyond a reasonable doubt. In this case you will learn that there were three Little Pigs and now before you seating here today is just one! Granted, that he was the sensible Little Pig who built his home out of brick unlike his brothers who built their homes out of Straw and Sticks, but the fact still remains, the wolf found the way to get into the brick house through the chimney with the sole purpose of eating the Little Pig, leaving the Little Pig no choice but to leave a kettle with out a lid. The prosecutors have the burden of proving their claims beyond a reasonable doubt, and when this case is all over and the evidence is in, I am counting on you, members of the jury, to find that The Little Pig is innocent!”
Well, that was a very powerful statement indeed! The first day is over, the jury is taken to the MidWoods hotel, and we are left to wonder what kind of evidence will be presented from both the prosecution and defense sides at tomorrow’s session. Did Piglet really tricked us into believing he was innocent? Or was it just a self defense? Will the name of Mr. T. Wolf be cleared of allegations? Or were we all deceived by his status in the society and didn't see his real intentions?
Stay tuned for more on the story.
Coming up next: An Exclusive Interview with the Mr. Wolf’s grandmother. What is the REAL reason of the continuous hatred between wolfs and pigs? Find out in just a few minutes after a short break.
Perpetrator or Victim?
We interrupt the regularly scheduled program for breaking news that just came in. In the recent months we have been following the story of the murder of Brer Wolf who many in the community perceived him as a deceitful man. We have just found out that Mr. Wolf had been suffering a life threatening condition. Apparently the only way to survive his dibilitating condition was to consume the DNA of piglets. The defense attorney, Mr. Wiggles has released a statement saying, " My client is not guilty due to reasonable insanity. He was told he only had one month to live and took drastic measures." The prosecution in the case argues there is no justification for taking a life to save another. "Eye for an eye" is not how we as mammals live in our quiet community.
Many townspeople continue to be frustrated with the piglets for not taking their mothers warning serious, and being naive. "She was one tough cookie who knew that her children would be targeted", said HorseyMorse, a local resident of animalville. He went on to say, " her children took after her acting fearless but when faced with the wolf were not able to conquer." We do not know for how long Mr. Wolf was stalking the piglets but rumors have been going around this small town that he followed Big Pig one day with the intent to eat him but instead got into a physical altercation where Big Pig was able to break free. Some question if Mr. Wolf at that point had a personal vendetta against Big Pig and continued to pursue him out of personal anger to save his life.
Although these crimes are horrific, the circumstances were different. Mr. Wolf had to eat the piglets to survive and Runt had to kill in self defense. So as the case is presented to the jury, they are asked the question... how far would you go to save your life?
We interrupt the regularly scheduled program for breaking news that just came in. In the recent months we have been following the story of the murder of Brer Wolf who many in the community perceived him as a deceitful man. We have just found out that Mr. Wolf had been suffering a life threatening condition. Apparently the only way to survive his dibilitating condition was to consume the DNA of piglets. The defense attorney, Mr. Wiggles has released a statement saying, " My client is not guilty due to reasonable insanity. He was told he only had one month to live and took drastic measures." The prosecution in the case argues there is no justification for taking a life to save another. "Eye for an eye" is not how we as mammals live in our quiet community.
Many townspeople continue to be frustrated with the piglets for not taking their mothers warning serious, and being naive. "She was one tough cookie who knew that her children would be targeted", said HorseyMorse, a local resident of animalville. He went on to say, " her children took after her acting fearless but when faced with the wolf were not able to conquer." We do not know for how long Mr. Wolf was stalking the piglets but rumors have been going around this small town that he followed Big Pig one day with the intent to eat him but instead got into a physical altercation where Big Pig was able to break free. Some question if Mr. Wolf at that point had a personal vendetta against Big Pig and continued to pursue him out of personal anger to save his life.
Although these crimes are horrific, the circumstances were different. Mr. Wolf had to eat the piglets to survive and Runt had to kill in self defense. So as the case is presented to the jury, they are asked the question... how far would you go to save your life?
Wolf's confession
Ladies and gentlemen, we interrupted our scheduled radio program for a very important message. Our special correspondent is currently located in the Central city courtroom, where the most scandal and highly speculated criminal case is being deliberated. Let me remind you that we are tracing the final stages of the process that for the last couple of months attracted unparalleled attention of near all residents of our small town. Alex T. Wolf is accused of murdering two innocent pigs, brothers Danny and Rubby, and attempted murder their third brother Vinny, who magically escaped the tragedy. Today the legal process goes to an end. Prosecution side seems like the winners of the case, while all attempts of defendant’s attorneys to prove his innocence seemingly have not convinced the jury. So, ladies and gentlemen, right now the judge will let the defendant Alex T. Wolf address the jury his final words. Will he be able to convince them of his innocence? Well, it sounds unrealistically, but he definitely has the last chance to do so. Otherwise, he will be most probably sentenced to death for the second degree murder of two little pigs, residents of our lovely peaceful town. Right now I turn off my microphone so you will be able to hear the Wolf, as he already began his speech…
“Your honor judge, dear jury, fellow residents… I have been spending every minute since the day of that tragic incident that shaken up our peaceful town, continuously thinking why… Why it happened? Why it happened to me? Why it happened to my friends Danny and Rubby. Yes, do not be surprised, they were my friend, and I loved them. I visited their lovely houses many times, as well as they were always dear guests at my home. Our kids attended the same karate club and I remember as vivid as if it was only yesterday how they were coming home together dressed in kimono after the training session… It is very sad, ladies and gentlemen…Sad and tragic… Now I am trying to remind the smallest episodes of that horrible night, and I must confess that I am the only reason that Rubby and Danny are no longer with us, but at the same time… I am not guilty. To understand that controversy I pledge you for only one minute to turn to be a Wolf, in your imagination of course... Well, I realize this is hard, especially if you are a goose, cow or rabbit, like most of the present jury members. But, please, try even if it sounds mad, because otherwise the decision you are going to make tonight will not be as accurate as it should be. And I am afraid that it will be far from what we are all looking for – justice!
So, my dear friends … do you know what it means to be a Wolf? It means a constant fight with yourself. Unfortunately our society is not perfect and wolfs nowadays have to neighbor with their potential food. Sorry, for being not politcorrect, but you heard me right, I live very miserable life, every day masking what kind of person I actually am. It demands huge mental and physical efforts. Believe me, it is very hard to be a Wolf in our Pig’s world. But I got used to live that way, and everything went well up until that tragic day… I could not control my drives, a predator, a monster that was sleeping inside of me, woke suddenly up. Yes, I ate Ruby and Danny, but it was not actually me…It was my darkest and evil part, which I was not able to control for only half an hour... Yes I ate Rubby and Danny and scared to death Vinny, but I am not guilty!
Ladies and gentlemen, to conclude, I would like to question every and each of you: Will you be well with yourself after sending a Wolf to the electric chair, realizing that the only crime he committed was to be born a Wolf? God bless you, and let justice be done!”
We are going to commercial break.
“Your honor judge, dear jury, fellow residents… I have been spending every minute since the day of that tragic incident that shaken up our peaceful town, continuously thinking why… Why it happened? Why it happened to me? Why it happened to my friends Danny and Rubby. Yes, do not be surprised, they were my friend, and I loved them. I visited their lovely houses many times, as well as they were always dear guests at my home. Our kids attended the same karate club and I remember as vivid as if it was only yesterday how they were coming home together dressed in kimono after the training session… It is very sad, ladies and gentlemen…Sad and tragic… Now I am trying to remind the smallest episodes of that horrible night, and I must confess that I am the only reason that Rubby and Danny are no longer with us, but at the same time… I am not guilty. To understand that controversy I pledge you for only one minute to turn to be a Wolf, in your imagination of course... Well, I realize this is hard, especially if you are a goose, cow or rabbit, like most of the present jury members. But, please, try even if it sounds mad, because otherwise the decision you are going to make tonight will not be as accurate as it should be. And I am afraid that it will be far from what we are all looking for – justice!
So, my dear friends … do you know what it means to be a Wolf? It means a constant fight with yourself. Unfortunately our society is not perfect and wolfs nowadays have to neighbor with their potential food. Sorry, for being not politcorrect, but you heard me right, I live very miserable life, every day masking what kind of person I actually am. It demands huge mental and physical efforts. Believe me, it is very hard to be a Wolf in our Pig’s world. But I got used to live that way, and everything went well up until that tragic day… I could not control my drives, a predator, a monster that was sleeping inside of me, woke suddenly up. Yes, I ate Ruby and Danny, but it was not actually me…It was my darkest and evil part, which I was not able to control for only half an hour... Yes I ate Rubby and Danny and scared to death Vinny, but I am not guilty!
Ladies and gentlemen, to conclude, I would like to question every and each of you: Will you be well with yourself after sending a Wolf to the electric chair, realizing that the only crime he committed was to be born a Wolf? God bless you, and let justice be done!”
We are going to commercial break.
Brutal murder of a Doctor
The typhus epidemic broke out in the village among pigs.
Fortunately, Brer Wolf was an experienced doctor who could recognize the illness just by looking at the patient. He was in very good relationships with sow mother, who asked Wolf to visit her daughters occasionally to make sure that they are not contaminated. Regrettably, once infected a pig couldn’t be cured. After his or her death burying a contaminated flesh would result in more extensive spike of epidemic due to rapid growth of this bacterium in the soil.
Before the death sow mother advised her piggy-children that “if they could escape from old Brer Wolf, they'd be doing monstrously well.” In other words, if Brer Wolf didn’t find any signs of typhus epidemic during his visits it would mean that escape from the illness is guaranteed.
Obviously, piggy-children were afraid to hear the diagnosis “ill” from the Brer Wolf. For that reason, they have employed any possible strategy to oppose seeing the doctor.
During the visit of Big Pig’s house Brer Wolf had to use roasting ears to persuade the Big Pig to open the door. Once Brer Wolf saw Big Pig it was obvious that she was badly contaminated. The only way to ease her sufferings was to gobble her up before she realizes her wretched condition.
The same situation occurred with the Little Pig and with the Speckled Pig since they were incurably infected.
The Runt Pig resisted Wolf’s check up with zeal rejecting any possibility of meeting the doctor. Highly responsible doctor wouldn’t allow the spread of infection; therefore each piggy had to be examined to make sure that typhus epidemic will be extirpated without a single possibility to spike again which would cause a threat to the whole piggy village.
Desperate attempt to examine the Runt Pig's condition resulted in consequent murder of the Brer Wolf by Runt Pig. She had cruelly burned the doctor "to a crackling."
Right know there is no doctor left in the village. Who knows what’s going to happen with its inhabitants.
Fortunately, Brer Wolf was an experienced doctor who could recognize the illness just by looking at the patient. He was in very good relationships with sow mother, who asked Wolf to visit her daughters occasionally to make sure that they are not contaminated. Regrettably, once infected a pig couldn’t be cured. After his or her death burying a contaminated flesh would result in more extensive spike of epidemic due to rapid growth of this bacterium in the soil.
Before the death sow mother advised her piggy-children that “if they could escape from old Brer Wolf, they'd be doing monstrously well.” In other words, if Brer Wolf didn’t find any signs of typhus epidemic during his visits it would mean that escape from the illness is guaranteed.
Obviously, piggy-children were afraid to hear the diagnosis “ill” from the Brer Wolf. For that reason, they have employed any possible strategy to oppose seeing the doctor.
During the visit of Big Pig’s house Brer Wolf had to use roasting ears to persuade the Big Pig to open the door. Once Brer Wolf saw Big Pig it was obvious that she was badly contaminated. The only way to ease her sufferings was to gobble her up before she realizes her wretched condition.
The same situation occurred with the Little Pig and with the Speckled Pig since they were incurably infected.
The Runt Pig resisted Wolf’s check up with zeal rejecting any possibility of meeting the doctor. Highly responsible doctor wouldn’t allow the spread of infection; therefore each piggy had to be examined to make sure that typhus epidemic will be extirpated without a single possibility to spike again which would cause a threat to the whole piggy village.
Desperate attempt to examine the Runt Pig's condition resulted in consequent murder of the Brer Wolf by Runt Pig. She had cruelly burned the doctor "to a crackling."
Right know there is no doctor left in the village. Who knows what’s going to happen with its inhabitants.
Thursday, September 25, 2008
terrible murder
Forrest news presents.
We just found out about the most horrible event you could ever heard about since the forrest-wide-known crazy rabbit Joe killed poor bear Bob.
Yesterday Forrest police had call from two security guards. It was said that on the west side of the Forrest 2 pigs brothers were found murdered in the most horrible way – they have been eaten alive!!! The only parts of them police could find were their ears and teeth. The names of those two brothers were Mr. Hru and Mr. Hru the Second. They were two of three brothers. The third pig brother Mr. Hru the Third was in his house in very unstable condition.
It was found out that the day before the event all three pigs were having a few drinks in the Forrest bar with other animals. Then the Wolf came. His name was Lecter and he was already drunk and very hungry. There were lot of food around, but Lecter was hungry for blood! He followed the first pig on his way home. Mr. Hru lived in a small house on the 1st street. The Wolf came into his house through the window, found Mr. Hru laying on his bed and ate him piece by piece, living just his small ears, which he put in the fridge. In that house he found the address of his brother Mr. Hru the Second. He went to his house also, which was located just few blocks away.
After the first pig the wolf was crazy for blood! It took him only ten minutes to get into the house and eat the second pig. And again he left pig's ears in the fridge. What a crazy animal! Then he went to the third brother Mr. Hru the Third. He lived in a penthouse just 10 blocks away with a security in it. When Lecter came into the house he was stopped and asked to explain the reason of coming. The Wolf said that he had some business to talk about. The third brother came and saw blood on the Wolf’s shirt. The guardians called the police.
Police came fifteen minutes later and told Mr. Hru the Third about his brothers. It was such a shock for him that he cannot say a word for already three days.
The representative from Forrest police department announced that the court found Mr. Lecter guilty and the Wolf will be prosecuted tomorrow on the Forrest square at 1 p.m.
This the most horrible event in the history of Forrest. The king announced this day as a Sad Day. Also parents of the pigs will get a compensation from the Forrest government.
Thank you for being with us. Forrest news.
Will the Criminal Get Away !!
Good evening everyone thank you for joining us for the 10 news at 10 tonight.
Mr. Wolf was finally arrested Thursday in Huff Puff Village, on murder charges.
We will shortly be reporting to you on the immediate results of this trial and its effects on the residents of "Far Away Land”
We now go live to Fiona as she tracks the progress of the trial that is being held.
Fiona, where is Mr. Wolf at this time?
Fiona- Mr. Wolf is with his attorney Ms. Foxy, and he seems to be engaged in an intense conversation with her while a witness is being called.
Shrek- Fiona can you, in the meantime, recap some of the facts we have regarding this case?
Fiona- sure!!
Mr. Wolf was spotted trying to visit Piglet for three days in a row right after the brutal death of his two older brothers .Mr. Wolf, expressed his concern for Piglet after that drastic news, so he wanted to help him change his mood. He apparently invited piglet for various occasions such as going to Mr. Smith’s home field to get some turnips, and then go to pick some apples at merry garden and also to attend the Shanklin fair. Although, Wolf had to miss that one because of a severe chest pain he felt while on his way to the fair.
Shrek: thank you Fiona!!
So is Mr. Wolf guilty or not guilty??
We’ll keep you updated as events begin to unfold
Now, reporting live from outside the courthouse:
The Goslings are back rioting!!!
Fiona-What do you think Daffy, is this another de ja vu or what???
Daffy- I believe it is, I was strong enough for my siblings!! Luckily the greedy Wolf had swallowed them whole.
But this should be the end of the story of the wolves .
It was only a couple of years ago that his uncle was sitting in that chair,and today it's him!!
People of “Far Away Land” should know the truth, the whole truth!
Fiona- I have more people joining the goslings by the second,
People are being influenced by their message!
Fiona- Shrek! At this point both sides are making their final argument, and it seems to be quite dramatic and effective.
We are about to hear the final verdict. So what do you think??
Shrek- let’s wait and see
Courtroom:
Clerk: all rise , Is there a verdict?
Foreperson: yes
Judge: the defendant is found guilty of charge and he will be handed over to Piglet, so he can boil him up and eat him for supper!!
Fiona- Piglet , what are your comments ?
Piglet - i will live happily ever after !
Shrek: Thank you Fiona for your very thorough report
Finally, from all of us at ten news at ten,
Thank you and Good Night
Mr. Wolf was finally arrested Thursday in Huff Puff Village, on murder charges.
We will shortly be reporting to you on the immediate results of this trial and its effects on the residents of "Far Away Land”
We now go live to Fiona as she tracks the progress of the trial that is being held.
Fiona, where is Mr. Wolf at this time?
Fiona- Mr. Wolf is with his attorney Ms. Foxy, and he seems to be engaged in an intense conversation with her while a witness is being called.
Shrek- Fiona can you, in the meantime, recap some of the facts we have regarding this case?
Fiona- sure!!
Mr. Wolf was spotted trying to visit Piglet for three days in a row right after the brutal death of his two older brothers .Mr. Wolf, expressed his concern for Piglet after that drastic news, so he wanted to help him change his mood. He apparently invited piglet for various occasions such as going to Mr. Smith’s home field to get some turnips, and then go to pick some apples at merry garden and also to attend the Shanklin fair. Although, Wolf had to miss that one because of a severe chest pain he felt while on his way to the fair.
Shrek: thank you Fiona!!
So is Mr. Wolf guilty or not guilty??
We’ll keep you updated as events begin to unfold
Now, reporting live from outside the courthouse:
The Goslings are back rioting!!!
Fiona-What do you think Daffy, is this another de ja vu or what???
Daffy- I believe it is, I was strong enough for my siblings!! Luckily the greedy Wolf had swallowed them whole.
But this should be the end of the story of the wolves .
It was only a couple of years ago that his uncle was sitting in that chair,and today it's him!!
People of “Far Away Land” should know the truth, the whole truth!
Fiona- I have more people joining the goslings by the second,
People are being influenced by their message!
Fiona- Shrek! At this point both sides are making their final argument, and it seems to be quite dramatic and effective.
We are about to hear the final verdict. So what do you think??
Shrek- let’s wait and see
Courtroom:
Clerk: all rise , Is there a verdict?
Foreperson: yes
Judge: the defendant is found guilty of charge and he will be handed over to Piglet, so he can boil him up and eat him for supper!!
Fiona- Piglet , what are your comments ?
Piglet - i will live happily ever after !
Shrek: Thank you Fiona for your very thorough report
Finally, from all of us at ten news at ten,
Thank you and Good Night
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Poor Wolf
Here's the real story. The hardlining facts the papers don't want you to read. T wolf had know the pigs for some time. For years they had traveled with a petting zoo company and had thus far only lived in tents. "I'm a goat," said the goat, for he was a goat and was simple. He ate trash and was happy to live under a tent.All the animals lived out under tents in perfect harmony and all things were good.
But the pigs, being the pigs they were, became greedy. "I want a custom RV, with cable television, and a chicken rotisserisizer." This terrified the chickens, who were chickens, and were happy to live simple lives under tents. "BGGOK!!" Said one of the chickens, for he was a chicken, and his utterings were unintelligible.
This is not good said Mr. T wolf, we need enough food to go around for everyone, and simply can't afford these expenditures. The pig became very upset and hasteful. "See what's to become of your food old woof," and late in the evening, in a fit of rage built a house out of hay that was food for the livestock. The next morning all the animals woke up for breakfast to find him sleeping in inside his house of hay.
The wolf knew what had to be done, and blew the house down.
It was a cold day that day it was and all the animals were silent, except for one of the other of the three pigs. For this pigs name was Larry, and he didn't do shit. The zoo labored on throughout the day and all the animals did their part, except Larry.
But the end of the day came, and all things were done, and the time had come to build a fire, for it was time for a great feast to celebrate the day. But when T Wolf went to get wood there was no more. For Larry was not happy living simply under the tent, and had used it all to build a house.
Again the wolf had to get it back, and he blew the house down.
The third day Simon, a happy pig who loved the tent, decided to build a house out of stone. This was a bad day for T Wolf, and T Wolf saw the house and without making an intelligent assessment concluded the house was another wasteful act of greed. But he was mistaken, and it isn't allways wrong to have nice things, this is America bitch. So the wolf huffed and puffed and puffed and huffed and huffed some more collapsing to the ground and weezing.
"Shame on you Mr. T wolf," said Simon. And the wolf was forgotten for his heroics and seen as a total jerk for the rest of his life.
THE END
Saturday, May 24, 2008
"Poor Alex"
The Wolf Express
Every year around this time Alexander T. Wolf plans a birthday party for his grandmother, and this year was no exception. Although the party would always have just two attendees, he knew it meant everything for his eighty-nine year old grandmother to be with the only person she had in the world, him. You see, poor Alex and his grandmother had lost their entire family in a bloody massacre carried out by some humans (who by the way, to this day have never been disciplined) while on a family picnic at Central Park. Mr. Wolf and his grandmother only survived because they were a bit tardy, preparing the picnic cake.
This year, unfortunately, there would no such party, as Alexander T. Wolf is laying in a cold prison cell, accused of a double homicide. The humans have alleged that sweet Alex, intentionally murdered two, of the three famous Pig Brothers that live on that prime piece of real estate downtown Brooklyn, yes the same property that billionaire Donald Dump has been trying to acquire for the last year to build “his” super ball park; the property the pigs refused to sell.
Alexander explained the events on that ill-fated morning, as he walked by the five acre property he noticed that something was not right. First of all Mr. Chops – the local butcher and sworn enemy of the pigs – truck was parked outside. As if that was not bad enough, two trucks from Mr. Donald Dump’s construction company were unloading equipment out front. Although he had a cold, and he was headed to Mrs. Hen’s house to borrow some sugar, he put aside the problems he and the pigs had in the past, entered the property and headed for the first pig’s house. He would save the day; after all they were still all animals. He might even borrow some sugar for granny’s cake and invite the pigs to the party.
On getting to the first house which was made of straw, he felt a sneeze coming on, as soon as he knocked the sneeze came out blowing the house down. Alarmed at how easy the house fell, Alex ran in to apologize to Pig Tail, the youngest of the three boys. As the dust settled he noticed that the pig was dead on the floor. It was at that moment everything became clear to Mr. Alexander T. Wolf – the humans had started plotting against them. Images of his dead family flashed in front of him. He would not let the butcher sell his animal buddy. Although Alex had been a vegetarian for the past ten years, he took one for the team, he ate the pig.
He moved quickly to the next house on the property, maybe he could save the rest. Low and behold the exact thing happened. And again he did the honorable thing, he ate the second pig.
By the time he got to the last house, he was sweating, sneezing and screaming. He just wanted the last brother to be saved, he had been there before, and he knew how it felt to lose family. The pig inside, unaware of what was going on outside heard the racket, and got frightened. This is when it all happened; the cops were everywhere accusing him of crimes. They threw him in the back of a truck and the last thing he saw was Mr. Chops consoling the last surviving pig.
Sunday, May 18, 2008
Winny LeBunny here with Animal5 News..
Good evening ladies and gentlemen. I apologize for the program interruption but there is big important news tonight that just came from Mississippig town. We urged you, the audience, at home to be more cautious with your surroundings. So, please stay tuned for more information and don’t go anywhere after this short break.
Back to Animal5 News.. with me Winny LeBunny.. As I mentioned earlier, there’s important news from Mississippig town. Apparently, 2 pig brothers from McPiggy family were murdered at the scene. First victim is Alpha McPiggy, the eldest in the family, who died instantly because a wolf ate him. The second victim is Beta McPiggy, The second brother of Alpha, who also died because the wolf ate him. The suspect here, Alexander T. Wolf from a little town called Wolverine City. Now, we are going to ask several neighbors who witnessed the crime…
Winny LeBunny: “Good evening, Mr. Frogolets.. What can you tell us about the crime?”
Mr. Frogolets: “It was very devastating for me to hear and see what was happening in my very own lovable neighborhood. I can’t believe my eyes when I saw the Wolf approached Alpha’s straw house from a distance. He blew the house and BAAM!!.. the house was falling into pieces.. and I saw.. with my own eyes.. the wolf came near to the pig who was hiding on the ground and he ate him up just like that! What a grotesque event! “
Winny LeBunny: “By the name of our Goddess Aiga!!! What a heartless creature the wolf is!! Thank you Mr.Froglets for your information”
So, viewers… From one of our witnesses, we may conclude that this wolf is very dangerous. It is very odd to know about his unethical behavior because from our further investigation about the wolf, he has no police record shown and has been a good resident of Mississipig Town. As the matter of fact, Al the wolf is very active in his community and was a president of wolf-book-club for 2 years. Surprisingly, he loved to take care of his Grandmother who is 80 years old (well.. human ages)! His grandmother also was very shocked about the news. I will quote from her, she said “… my grandson is a very loving creature.. I can’t believe he did such a foolish thing. It breaks my heart to know that now he’s in jail. I don’t have anyone to rely on because his grandfather died a long time ago in a Wolf War IV. No one will ever bake my favorite chocolate windmill cake for my birthday. Each year he always baked my desired cake… I will miss him dearly…” and she started crying again…
To proof our criminal record, lets here a second opinion from another witness that saw the crime..
Winny LeBunny: “Hello Mrs. Deerla.. Can you tell us what you saw that afternoon when the crime occurred? Where were you?”
Mrs. Deerla: “Yes, I was coming home from Cervidae-Park with my son and all I saw was this big Gigantic wolf puffing Betta’s house that made from woods.. then we ran to hid ourselves, next thing I saw the wolf ate the pig and I can clearly see he said, “another fancy dinner..” I was terrified.. I had to close my son’s eyes because it will hurt him mentally about the scene.”
Winny LeBunny: “My oh my… but did it ever occur in your mind that this is an accident event?”
Mrs. Deerla: “What do you mean by that?”
Winny LeBunny: “I mean.. What if the pig died already because of the falling house?”
Mrs. Deerla: “It couldn’t be.. I know for sure that the wolf ate him! Common’ wolf is a Bad bad horrible creature! All of universe inhabitants know that!!!”
Winny LeBunny: “Thank you for your time, Mrs. Deerla”
Last standing victim who survived from the criminal scene is Gamma McPiggy. Astonishingly, He did not have any injuries from the event. However, his mental now disturbed knowing that 2 of his siblings died already. Now, we complete our interview by asking questions to Mr. Gamma Mcpiggy himself about the incident.
Winny LeBunny: “Sorry for the interruption Mr. Mcpiggy, but how do you feel about the incident?”
Mr. Gamma McPiggy: “I’m very miserable! I lost all of my siblings.. *Sobs*”
Winny LeBunny: “Can you recall what was happening that afternoon at your house?”
Mr. Gamma McPiggy: “I remember I received a phone call from my neighbor, Mrs.Deerla, who said that there was this big wolf murdered one of my sibling.. then, I prepared myself for his visits because I know he will visit my house soon. My feeling is never wrong! The bell rang, and yes it was him! He said that he wanted to borrow a cup of sugar to make a birthday cake for his grandmother! NONE SENSE! We all know his intention, he wanted another “fancy dinner”.. So I refused to open the door for him! Then he turned ballistic after my comment about his grandmother! Of course, he started puffing and blowing.. But my house was made out of bricks! He cannot compete with my intellectual minds! Soon after, the police came and caught his act! And yes.. send him to prison!”
Winny LeBunny: “Wow… you are a very courageous creature Mr. McPiggy! I deeply sorry for your lost and hope that you may cope it soon.. Thank you for your time..”
Lastly viewers, what we can learn from this event is.. “Don’t open your door to any stranger! Especially the wolf! He is simply a bad-heartless animal who can easily knock on your door acting sweet and innocent. Currently, the wolf is in Guantanamerra-Prison near the forbidden forest and faced the sentence for all of his life! Live at Mississipig Town, with me Winny LeBunny, Animal5 News…
Back to Animal5 News.. with me Winny LeBunny.. As I mentioned earlier, there’s important news from Mississippig town. Apparently, 2 pig brothers from McPiggy family were murdered at the scene. First victim is Alpha McPiggy, the eldest in the family, who died instantly because a wolf ate him. The second victim is Beta McPiggy, The second brother of Alpha, who also died because the wolf ate him. The suspect here, Alexander T. Wolf from a little town called Wolverine City. Now, we are going to ask several neighbors who witnessed the crime…
Winny LeBunny: “Good evening, Mr. Frogolets.. What can you tell us about the crime?”
Mr. Frogolets: “It was very devastating for me to hear and see what was happening in my very own lovable neighborhood. I can’t believe my eyes when I saw the Wolf approached Alpha’s straw house from a distance. He blew the house and BAAM!!.. the house was falling into pieces.. and I saw.. with my own eyes.. the wolf came near to the pig who was hiding on the ground and he ate him up just like that! What a grotesque event! “
Winny LeBunny: “By the name of our Goddess Aiga!!! What a heartless creature the wolf is!! Thank you Mr.Froglets for your information”
So, viewers… From one of our witnesses, we may conclude that this wolf is very dangerous. It is very odd to know about his unethical behavior because from our further investigation about the wolf, he has no police record shown and has been a good resident of Mississipig Town. As the matter of fact, Al the wolf is very active in his community and was a president of wolf-book-club for 2 years. Surprisingly, he loved to take care of his Grandmother who is 80 years old (well.. human ages)! His grandmother also was very shocked about the news. I will quote from her, she said “… my grandson is a very loving creature.. I can’t believe he did such a foolish thing. It breaks my heart to know that now he’s in jail. I don’t have anyone to rely on because his grandfather died a long time ago in a Wolf War IV. No one will ever bake my favorite chocolate windmill cake for my birthday. Each year he always baked my desired cake… I will miss him dearly…” and she started crying again…
To proof our criminal record, lets here a second opinion from another witness that saw the crime..
Winny LeBunny: “Hello Mrs. Deerla.. Can you tell us what you saw that afternoon when the crime occurred? Where were you?”
Mrs. Deerla: “Yes, I was coming home from Cervidae-Park with my son and all I saw was this big Gigantic wolf puffing Betta’s house that made from woods.. then we ran to hid ourselves, next thing I saw the wolf ate the pig and I can clearly see he said, “another fancy dinner..” I was terrified.. I had to close my son’s eyes because it will hurt him mentally about the scene.”
Winny LeBunny: “My oh my… but did it ever occur in your mind that this is an accident event?”
Mrs. Deerla: “What do you mean by that?”
Winny LeBunny: “I mean.. What if the pig died already because of the falling house?”
Mrs. Deerla: “It couldn’t be.. I know for sure that the wolf ate him! Common’ wolf is a Bad bad horrible creature! All of universe inhabitants know that!!!”
Winny LeBunny: “Thank you for your time, Mrs. Deerla”
Last standing victim who survived from the criminal scene is Gamma McPiggy. Astonishingly, He did not have any injuries from the event. However, his mental now disturbed knowing that 2 of his siblings died already. Now, we complete our interview by asking questions to Mr. Gamma Mcpiggy himself about the incident.
Winny LeBunny: “Sorry for the interruption Mr. Mcpiggy, but how do you feel about the incident?”
Mr. Gamma McPiggy: “I’m very miserable! I lost all of my siblings.. *Sobs*”
Winny LeBunny: “Can you recall what was happening that afternoon at your house?”
Mr. Gamma McPiggy: “I remember I received a phone call from my neighbor, Mrs.Deerla, who said that there was this big wolf murdered one of my sibling.. then, I prepared myself for his visits because I know he will visit my house soon. My feeling is never wrong! The bell rang, and yes it was him! He said that he wanted to borrow a cup of sugar to make a birthday cake for his grandmother! NONE SENSE! We all know his intention, he wanted another “fancy dinner”.. So I refused to open the door for him! Then he turned ballistic after my comment about his grandmother! Of course, he started puffing and blowing.. But my house was made out of bricks! He cannot compete with my intellectual minds! Soon after, the police came and caught his act! And yes.. send him to prison!”
Winny LeBunny: “Wow… you are a very courageous creature Mr. McPiggy! I deeply sorry for your lost and hope that you may cope it soon.. Thank you for your time..”
Lastly viewers, what we can learn from this event is.. “Don’t open your door to any stranger! Especially the wolf! He is simply a bad-heartless animal who can easily knock on your door acting sweet and innocent. Currently, the wolf is in Guantanamerra-Prison near the forbidden forest and faced the sentence for all of his life! Live at Mississipig Town, with me Winny LeBunny, Animal5 News…
Friday, March 28, 2008
Wolf Framed by Porn Chops.
We interrupt this program to bring to you breaking news! Two gruesome murders have been reported on NoSugarComingMyWay lane. The main suspect under interrogation at the moment is Al the wolf. For more information don’t touch the clicker or visit our website oinknews.com.
According to our head reporter Wogger Wabbit, the police have found blood stained hay at PIG10210 and sausage casings at PIG10211. Eyewitness super honey collector Mrs. Bee said she had seen the whole debacle and it wasn’t a murder, it was just a case of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. The OMDFPD (Old Mac Donald’s Farm Police Department) refused to comment on the proceedings due to the ongoing investigation.
Wogger Wabbit – Mrs. Bee What were you doing when you saw these events take place?
Mrs. Bee - It all happened so fast, one minute I was collecting honey and the next I saw two dead pigs and a sick wolf. I was collecting honey to make my famous honey ice cream with honey and choco chip coating for Al’s granny’s birthday, when I saw Al and decided to speak to him. He mentioned he was on the lookout for a cup of sugar because he had run out of it at the last moment while making a cake for his grandma.
Wogger Wabbit – Is it true that it was pollen from you that caused Al to sneeze and blow the houses down?
Mrs. Bee – Yes it was the pollen in the air due to my honey collection. We were just talking about Grandma Wolf when we heard the first pig curse at the two of us, just then the pollen from my legs which began to infiltrate Al the Wolf’s nostrils causing him to sneeze and thus blowing the house down. It was at this point when we both found the first ping mangled in the hay with blood oozing out of his head. Even though Al was saddened by this fatality he couldn’t just leave good food to spoil. So, he made ham of the dead pig and devoured it.
Wogger Wabbit – What about the other two pigs Mrs. Bee?
Mrs. Bee - It was now getting late so I walked with Al to the second pigs home to ask for sugar. But, before we could even knock at the stick door we saw red gleaming eyes and heard a fuming grunt. On approaching the door we heard the second pig babbling something to the effect of, get out you hideous creatures.
Wogger Wabbit – How did Al take this?
Mrs. Bee - Al spoke up saying, “Sorry Sir I am only here to get a cup of sugar I mean no harm.” Just then the pollen began to play up with Al the wolf’s asthma and he began to sneeze, thus blowing down the second pig’s house and killing him. Amongst the rubble Al found some chicken sausages and sausage casings. It was just too tempting and Al couldn’t bare the site of wasted food, so he decided to make sausages out of the second pig and have his second meal of the day.
Wogger Wabbit- Who called the police? And how did they know where to find the wolf?
Mrs. Bee -It was almost afternoon and Al still had no sugar. He decided to go next door to the third pig’s house, hoping that the third pig would be nicer and generous. But, when we approached the walk way there were cops pulling into the drive way. Al didn’t know what was happening and had nowhere to run. It was the third pig that called the police claiming to have seen Al the wolf murder the other two pigs.
Wogger Wabbit – Thank you so much for coming on our show Mrs. Bee and answering our questions.
Mrs. Bee – Thank you for having me, I hope Al is given a fair trial.
Wogger Wabbit – That’s all from me folks, back to you Steve.
Steve - At this moment Al is still being questioned by lead detectives on the case. The OMDFPD refused to give out details of whether Al would make bail or if he had a lawyer.
Stay tuned, coming up next after the break is Sharon with details on the Supreme Court versus Little Bo Peep.
Monday, March 24, 2008
Alexander T. Wolf's Trial Alive
… Please stay tune with BSN as we having Martha reporting alive at Wild Hill’s court room.
Thanks James. We are alive outside of the court room where the trial to Alexander T. Wolf is being held. Now let’s recap the facts around this case. Alexander T. Wolf after spending several months in jail has not received a sentence yet and this case remains unsolved. He still claims himself as innocent on the murdered of two famous pigs, Porky and Babe. He said: “I am innocent. I am being judge based on the fact that I am a wolf and wolfs have a reputation of being killers but I will do whatever it takes to prove mi innocence”.
Well Martha, it seems like if his allegation is being treat unfair because he is a wolf, let’s remind our audience that statistics shows a high percentage of crime and murders in this town are committed by wolfs.
That’s right James; he is claiming being unfair treated because of his nature, he has no criminal records however there is evidence which accuses Alexander T. Wolf as the murder but there are huge discrepancies on the different sides of the stories and that is the cause for the judges not to give a final verdict. Let’s also note that if he is found guilty he could face death penalty according to the law here in Wild Hill where they reside. We tried to have an interview with Alexander himself or his lawyer but both had declined of offering any details to the press. Forensics and detectives are still working on investigations. As per the only relative who survived, he was discharged yesterday after remaining several weeks hospitalized for suffering a heart attack that might’ve been caused by the impact of the murdered of his other two brothers.
Martha, we’ve been informed that he will be testifying today is that correct.
That is correct James; we haven’t seen him come out just yet. His testimony is actually considered as the last piece on this case that caught the world’s attention mostly because of the several versions we’ve heard around it. He had several interviews with the detectives working on this case, however as it has been known, he wasn’t present at the moment where the murders took place but no further details have been revealed. James, at the end of the trial one of the detectives will give a press conference…
James, we’ve heard that this trial finally has come to an end and Alexander T. Wolf has been convicted to death penalty on the murder of Porky and Babe. We are seeing now the surviving pig, Doug. Let’s hear what he has to say: “We are very pleased with our legal system finally the villain will pay for what he did. He took away my brothers, the only thing I had, and he has destroyed not only their lives but mine too. He must pay with his own life that’s just justice…”
Let’s hear to Alexander’s grandmother: “This is a huge mistake, my grandson is innocent he is a good wolf and is being unfairly treated…”
As we could appreciate she is destroyed by the news of her grandson….
Alexander did not want to give any interview or talk to the press neither has his lawyer but it was his little brother John who claimed: “I’ll revenge my bro’s death. All of you people have made a huge mistake on accusing him of something he did not do and be aware that you and your children will hear from me...”
A good bye letter from Alexander to Grandma’ and the lil bro has been revealed on it he tells his side of the story and “the only true” of the facts. He claims his innocence until the time he is taken to the gas chamber.
Thanks James. We are alive outside of the court room where the trial to Alexander T. Wolf is being held. Now let’s recap the facts around this case. Alexander T. Wolf after spending several months in jail has not received a sentence yet and this case remains unsolved. He still claims himself as innocent on the murdered of two famous pigs, Porky and Babe. He said: “I am innocent. I am being judge based on the fact that I am a wolf and wolfs have a reputation of being killers but I will do whatever it takes to prove mi innocence”.
Well Martha, it seems like if his allegation is being treat unfair because he is a wolf, let’s remind our audience that statistics shows a high percentage of crime and murders in this town are committed by wolfs.
That’s right James; he is claiming being unfair treated because of his nature, he has no criminal records however there is evidence which accuses Alexander T. Wolf as the murder but there are huge discrepancies on the different sides of the stories and that is the cause for the judges not to give a final verdict. Let’s also note that if he is found guilty he could face death penalty according to the law here in Wild Hill where they reside. We tried to have an interview with Alexander himself or his lawyer but both had declined of offering any details to the press. Forensics and detectives are still working on investigations. As per the only relative who survived, he was discharged yesterday after remaining several weeks hospitalized for suffering a heart attack that might’ve been caused by the impact of the murdered of his other two brothers.
Martha, we’ve been informed that he will be testifying today is that correct.
That is correct James; we haven’t seen him come out just yet. His testimony is actually considered as the last piece on this case that caught the world’s attention mostly because of the several versions we’ve heard around it. He had several interviews with the detectives working on this case, however as it has been known, he wasn’t present at the moment where the murders took place but no further details have been revealed. James, at the end of the trial one of the detectives will give a press conference…
James, we’ve heard that this trial finally has come to an end and Alexander T. Wolf has been convicted to death penalty on the murder of Porky and Babe. We are seeing now the surviving pig, Doug. Let’s hear what he has to say: “We are very pleased with our legal system finally the villain will pay for what he did. He took away my brothers, the only thing I had, and he has destroyed not only their lives but mine too. He must pay with his own life that’s just justice…”
Let’s hear to Alexander’s grandmother: “This is a huge mistake, my grandson is innocent he is a good wolf and is being unfairly treated…”
As we could appreciate she is destroyed by the news of her grandson….
Alexander did not want to give any interview or talk to the press neither has his lawyer but it was his little brother John who claimed: “I’ll revenge my bro’s death. All of you people have made a huge mistake on accusing him of something he did not do and be aware that you and your children will hear from me...”
A good bye letter from Alexander to Grandma’ and the lil bro has been revealed on it he tells his side of the story and “the only true” of the facts. He claims his innocence until the time he is taken to the gas chamber.
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
The Villain of the Duality
(sirens going off)
September 11th - The Tragic Day
At 8 a.m. Monday, September 11th, the bloody remains of two medium sized pigs were found around Lakeshire, Piggington, just a mile away from each other.
According to the Police, the similar style of the slaying and the scenes of the remains strongly recommend a connection between the two pigs' killers, or killer; that's right, we've got a serial killer in town!
The authority warns the public, that the killer aims for pink pigs between the weight range of 200 pounds to 300 pounds. No gender preference. And looking at the mutilated bodies of these pigs, it seems like the suspect is well built, ferocious, and extremely strong.
September 12th - Fishing for Hate
After a day empty searching, the Police found no traces of the villain. They have decided to use the victims' brother as a bait, to draw out the criminal. Willing to cooperate at full capacity, the brother of the dead victims, Dr. Piggeinstein says to the Police:" I will do whatever it takes to bring this monster in custody! A finger for a finger, an eye for an eye! He has to pay the damn price!"
Later in the day, as Dr. Piggeinstein enjoys his sunny bath in the muddy garden, a wolf emerges in sight. He was in a worker's outfit, with a pair of dark shades on, and holding what appears to be a club in hand. As he picked up his pace, the police surrounding the pig house rushed up, snapped the wolf in hands and pinned him onto ground.
"What the hell is going on? I was just going to sweep the sidewalk clean," explained the wolf, "Let go of me!"
"You mister, are under arrest! Now keep that big mouth of yours shut before I shut it for you." The Police banged the wolf's head against the floor, and the wolf passed out.
September 13th - The Interrogation
Alex T. Wolf, standing 6 feet tall and weighing 230 pounds, with no prior criminal records. Many interviewees vouched for him and said Alex is a great guy. "He always helped milk me when I felt a little under the weather," said Mrs. SkinnyCow.
"Who are you? Why were you trying to sneak up against Dr. Piggeinstein? WHY DID YOU MURDER THOSE INNOCENT PIGS?" No matter how many times the questions were asked, the wolf only said he was innocent. According to an insider, the wolf seemed really sincere, maybe it's all a mistake, he's really innocent. Or is he?
The forensics conducted a DNA analysis and discovered that the hair evidence found at the crime scene to match that of Alex T. Wolf's. Alex freaked out and had a panic attack as he is informed such absurdity. Afraid that the wolf may be crazy, a psychiatrist is called in to assist.
September 14th - The Diagnosis
After hours of psychological questioning, Alex T. Wolf seemed to be breaking down! With veins popping, hair standing, and eyes bulging, the wolf seemed to be undergoing some weird transition.
All of a sudden, his voice sounded differently.
"What.. do you want from ME?! Why are you tormenting Alex like this. He is a great boy.. leave him alone!"
"Who are you?? I am just trying to help," explains the psychiatrist.
Angered, the wolf jumped and darted himself toward the poor psychiatrist. He grabbed the man's neck and whispered into his ears. "You really wanna know who I am? I am Alex's older brother, John. John T. Wolf. And for your information Doc, I killed those bastard pigs. I killed them both. They are just like their mother, the racist bitch that accused my innocent father of rape. Now go to the stupid police and tell them to find me. Leave Alex alone!"
Frightened, the psychiatrist exited and spoke to the Police and explained the case of Alex T. Wolf. "It seems like Alex T. Wolf is suffering from a severe case of split personality. Because he cannot process the fact that his dearest brother and father are both dead, a part of him took on the role of John, his older brother, to cope with the cruel facts." The psychiatrist continued, "Alex T. Wolf is a victim himself. Suffering extreme tragedies since such an early age. Whenever Alex can no longer repress his sorrows, his other side, John would kick in. It is probably during that time that he seeks out the pigs for revenge."
September 15th - The Trial Decisions
(closing statements)
Defense:" Impressive. The prosecutor can really sound very convincing at times. But do not let emotions blind your judgments. Alex T. Wolf has been through a lot. A lot more than anyone here. So much for an young adult, he has faced countless obstacles that people like you and me can only IMAGINE. Everyone makes mistakes. And just like everyone, Alex T. Wolf has made a mistake himself. He was too traumatized that his subconsciousness took over and committed something that he would never do. I bet he feels more remorse and regretful than anybody in this room. Two wrongs do not make it right. Now, Dear Jury, you have the power to make this right. I plead you all to vote my client not guilty.
After ten hours of hot debate among the jurors the decision has been reached. Alex T. Wolf is voted not guilty, but he must be administered to the Animal Mental Institute until he is fully recovered.
"This is not how it is supposed to end. How could the court let him walk!? He killed my brothers. He must die!" Dr. Piggeinstein yelled as reporters surrounded him outside the courthouse.
September 15th - The Final Incident
As the Police was transporting Alex T. Wolf toward the psychiatric center in the province, something happened.
Later that day, the Police car was discovered in the middle of a road, flipped upside down. The Police Officers were both dead with gunshot wounds, and a bullet has been put through the head of Alex T. Wolf.
Next to the crime scene, a manuscript is found. It reads:"I, Alex T. Wolf, have lied. And I deserve to die. I am a Big Bad Wolf."
Copycat Killer
Yesterday, at approximately 3 pm, there were two deaths reported on Fairy Tale Lane. The shocking part of this horrible event is that the popular childhood story called “Three Little Pigs” is an important piece of these deaths. According to Little Red, the reason for these deaths was because we have a copycat killer of the wolf from this children’s story. Witnesses say that they saw Alexander T. Wolf a.k.a. Al, at the scene of the crime. “He was trying to break into my best friend’s house” said the cow that jumped over the moon. According to Al, he was trying to borrow some sugar to make a cake for his grandmothers’ birthday, so he decided to see if pig 1 would give him some sugar. Then, he accidentally blew down his house, killing him pig 1. Al stated, “It seemed like a shame to leave a perfectly good ham dinner lying there in the straw. So I ate it up.” Pig 3 tried to attack Al while I was interviewing, which led to my camera man breaking his hand. (If any one wants a job, I’m hiring.) I kept trying to interview Pig 3, but he was still in shock of what Alexander T. Wolf did, I mean was suspected of doing. After Al ate up Pig 1, he went to Pig 2’s house to look for the sugar for the cake he wanted to bake for his grandmother. Coincidentally, the same exact thing that happened to Pig 1 happened to Pig 2. Al tried to do the same thing to Pig 3, but he was a little smarter than his brothers. So the wolf got caught by the police as he was breaking in or sneezing, according to him. When I mentioned to Alexander T. Wolf that hew was being called a “copycat killer”, he got really upset and said, “I am original. I am not trying to be anyone else but myself. I would never kill anyone, or at least not on purpose. I do not want to be compared to that wolf. We have nothing in common and I don’t see the connection.” He could believe all that he wants to believe, but the real question is, Does Alexander T. Wolf even have a grandmother? And was it really her birthday? Join me tomorrow to find out what really happened and the charges against Alexander T. Wolf, if any. That’s all folks.
Sunday, March 9, 2008
One day of Mr. Alexander T. Wolf life.
The small town story that had happened with the Three Little Pigs fetched a big interest around its population. The Wolf attacked the Three Little Pigs and ate two of them for a dinner. The media reporters found out about the story with all of the “Huff and puff and blow your house down”. A chase for a sensation sometimes hides a real story. They made Mr. Alexander T. Wolf “ the Big Bad Wolf”. He was arrested and now he is waiting for a trial. To better understand what was a real motive behind his actions and to understand the real story we have to hear both sides. The media usually represents the story from the Little Pigs perspectives only. They are small, quiet and defenseless. But what about the Wolf? To better understand the issue, I am going to investigate his side of the story
The story of a wolf named Alexander.T.Wolf and how a little pig changed his life. Many animals lived in a small quiet town where they became friends. One day Mr. Wolf decided to make a birthday cake for his lovely grandmother. Even though he had “a terrible sneezing cold” Alexander T. Wolf continued with the birthday cake but ran out of sugar. He decided to approach his neighbors and ask for a cup of sugar. The Three Little Pigs were called lazy, funky and fresh. The first brother pig was not very forward looking and built his house out of straw. When Alexander asked him for a cup of sugar, Lazy didn’t even answer. Given unfortunate cold, Mr. Wolf “sneezed a great sneeze” and inadvertly the weak house fell down and killed a little pig.
The same thing had happened to the Second Little Pig who built his house out of sticks. Mr. Wolf ended up in a situation were he had two juicy young pigs on his hands ready to eat and the only reasonable thing to do was to have them for a dinner. It was innocent accidents that lead to the death of two pigs. Some might say that it was even pigs’ fault that they did not built more secure houses with protection in he case of severe winds. To build a house like that would require a lot more effort from the pigs but they happened to be lazy and paid the price at the end. It is clear, the Wolf did not intend to attack the pigs nor did he want to kill them in order to get a good dinner. However, being a wolf in such a situation is not easy. Would that had been a cow or some other animal, nobody would ever suspect them in intentional murder.
The Third Little Pig was smart. He had a big strong house of bricks. When Alexander asked for a cup of sugar, he didn’t opened a door. Moreover, he shouted, “ Get out of here, Wolf. Don’t bother me again”. “What a pig!” Wolf was ready to go home when he “felt his cold coming on”. He sneezed and huffed and snuffed. “Then the third Pig yelled, “ And your old granny can sit on a pin”. So, usually “a pretty calm fellow” could not constrain himself and the Wolf “was framed”.
From mine point of view, the Wolf is not guilty. Sometimes the Pigs’ behavior might be the cause of the Wolf trouble. I hope that my investigation will help the jury look at the core of this case and be fair and free of tags placed by the society on some individuals just because of who they are.
The story of a wolf named Alexander.T.Wolf and how a little pig changed his life. Many animals lived in a small quiet town where they became friends. One day Mr. Wolf decided to make a birthday cake for his lovely grandmother. Even though he had “a terrible sneezing cold” Alexander T. Wolf continued with the birthday cake but ran out of sugar. He decided to approach his neighbors and ask for a cup of sugar. The Three Little Pigs were called lazy, funky and fresh. The first brother pig was not very forward looking and built his house out of straw. When Alexander asked him for a cup of sugar, Lazy didn’t even answer. Given unfortunate cold, Mr. Wolf “sneezed a great sneeze” and inadvertly the weak house fell down and killed a little pig.
The same thing had happened to the Second Little Pig who built his house out of sticks. Mr. Wolf ended up in a situation were he had two juicy young pigs on his hands ready to eat and the only reasonable thing to do was to have them for a dinner. It was innocent accidents that lead to the death of two pigs. Some might say that it was even pigs’ fault that they did not built more secure houses with protection in he case of severe winds. To build a house like that would require a lot more effort from the pigs but they happened to be lazy and paid the price at the end. It is clear, the Wolf did not intend to attack the pigs nor did he want to kill them in order to get a good dinner. However, being a wolf in such a situation is not easy. Would that had been a cow or some other animal, nobody would ever suspect them in intentional murder.
The Third Little Pig was smart. He had a big strong house of bricks. When Alexander asked for a cup of sugar, he didn’t opened a door. Moreover, he shouted, “ Get out of here, Wolf. Don’t bother me again”. “What a pig!” Wolf was ready to go home when he “felt his cold coming on”. He sneezed and huffed and snuffed. “Then the third Pig yelled, “ And your old granny can sit on a pin”. So, usually “a pretty calm fellow” could not constrain himself and the Wolf “was framed”.
From mine point of view, the Wolf is not guilty. Sometimes the Pigs’ behavior might be the cause of the Wolf trouble. I hope that my investigation will help the jury look at the core of this case and be fair and free of tags placed by the society on some individuals just because of who they are.
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